“Psychologist (psychotherapist) works as the identity (a)” - so taught us in the educational programs of the existential-humanistic approach, and with this fact, I agree so far.


due To any circumstances, working tool “personality” might come to the faulty condition. The reasons can be many: illness, loss and loss of different degree of severity, the crisis in work or relationships, etc. Very well, there is the possibility of personal therapy, supervision, communication in the professional community, the support of loved ones finally. But still at some moment raises profound questions: “what is the meaning of my work? ” (after all, to heal and to make happy all obviously will not work), “Yes, and who I work for by and large”? (we are not talking about the management, Directors and others who are above grade).

And, of course, all these concerns not only specialists in the helping professions, but also ordinary people who are faced with the figure of death in its various forms: dismissal, ending a relationship, fatigue/ exhaustion in consequence of other causes.

colors of the world fade (and it's not a metaphor), “the earth was slipping from under his feet” (as described by one client in a situation of loss of business), anxiety and “life is parallel to you, and you're behind glass or in a vacuum” (from the same work).

needless to say, I watched in horror the “collapse” of projects has long established activities for objective reasons , the gap and the end of significant relationships , and other difficulties that do not fit the puzzle into a beautiful picture and very well placed in the picture under the name “@@@@” (you can think out yourself) .

In these moments I want to turn back to lean on someone who is older, wiser, more experienced and ask (using controlled vocabulary): “ Why is it so? And what do you do?”

And if the situation is not solved, then it is likely to go into conflict, psychosomatics , addiction and other destruction.

Working with the supervisor, I learned a few important things. Here are two of them:

  1. “When fully populated one of the rooms, there is a need to explore the entire apartment.” Yes, it is experienced as thrash or hard-core, but the end justifies the means.
  2. “Listen to yourself carefully,” not immediately, but needs to have internal response to an event, a person, a note on the social network. This is it. Go there. (Private response I recognized a burst of energy or a feeling of warmth in the chest, but to each his own. That's for sure.)

in Other words, “when one ends, be sure to start something else.”

From the perspective of the procedural approach, we all contact each other at three levels of reality: concensuses ( we agreed to call “the handle”- the handle, and “table”- table, to make it clearer), dreaming level ( intuition, dreams, etc.) and the level of spiritual reality (what I would call a level of “Soul”).

And when the level of the individual is unable to cope with the events and tasks that occur, it is necessary to turn to the deeper layers of yourself- “the roof”( according to my client).

so, if you are faced with the “death” of career, business, your own views of the world, ending a relationship and maybe have a somatic symptom of the stress ( including depressed psycho-emotional state), I would suggest to do a little exercise:

Step 1. Inhale and exhale, sinking your attention into the body and physical sensations. If you have a symptom, how does it manifest itself now? Also note the feelings that are there now (just check that they are, without trying something to do with them).

Step 2. If your situation is related to the loss of business, work or practice in any field, imagine for a Force that leads, supports, protects, nourishes. Power that you work by and large. See how it looks. Understand that you have feelings for her.

-If your situation is related to the loss of relationships, imagine the Power behind this event. What she looks like? Do you feel it?

Step 3. Physically moved, become this Force and also understand that you feel there? You are the world, being this Power?

Perhaps you will understand the Power ( often in similar works, a Force of “Life” and sometimes”Death”, ”Love”, ”Harmony”, “Movement”, “Expansion”, etc.). I would like to note that the name is not important. Important as this Power that you feel.

As a Power, understand how you see the world around? What's most amazing is this power?

Step 4. If your situation is related to loss of business or employment being in a state of Power, see yourself. What do you feel besides yourself, who stands before you? What I want to say or do to address this man? If there is a message verbalize it.

-If your situation involves the loss of the relationship, also understand that you feel towards yourself. Also specify the message that is born.

Step 5. Without losing the resource of Power status, return to yourself. Remember the message that was announced by Force. How is it for you?

Step 6. And now again pay attention to the body, emotions, and symptom. What happens to them now? Whereby the manifestation of the symptom was less ( disappeared completely)?

of Course, this algorithm will not solve all the issues, but the knowledge and experience that there is one Who leads by the hand - is already a powerful resource for further movement and transformation that will be. Yes, some colleagues call it “magical thinking”. I'm not against this lens of perception, but I know that there are others. For example, this.

good Luck.

Verbitskaya Olga
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