Good evening, friends) for Almost a week this post "Matures" inside of me - and then, finally, he is ready to appear in front of you) Today in my publication will focus on the fears. Yes, most of those who have big eyes ))

People often turn to counselling or therapy queries that are somehow associated with fear. So I think will be relevant some practical tips that can help to overcome them. Today will restrict ourselves to ten items).

1. To see the sense "in the face". Most often, when the fear grabs from the inside, the first thing people want in any way to get rid of it. However, attempts by using self-deception to persuade yourself that nothing bad happens (either to escape can find refuge in the Internet, TV, food, cigarette and other addictions) as a rule, only give the feeling of more power over us. If we find the courage to directly admit to myself - Yes, I do fear - and to accept this fact, as a rule, the intensity of the sensation almost immediately becomes smaller.
2. To understand how the fear actually relates to the present. Sometimes what we do here and now is threatening something serious. More often, some (and often very significant) amount of fear that was borrowed by us from the past. Public speaking is afraid of a little girl inside who still wants to be all good, mindful of how important it was for her loved ones in childhood. Or small boy so upset, as if not to get a reprimand from his superiors (after all, You adult this reprimand is not a pleasant thing, but not exactly the end of the world). And then the logical continuation is the following paragraph.
3. To separate within these layers of feelings. You can tell your inner child "I understand that you're scared and it's okay to be afraid. But now you have I - adult". It is useful to make a reminder on hand, writing there his age. And at the moment when fear begins to seize you from the inside, to look back and mentally (or aloud, if the situation allows) to say: "I am...... (Your name). I ........ (Your real age on the passport). In the yard ....... (Now - 2018) year." This is a simple thing great returns in reality and it helps to gather "here and now". But it is very important that was conducted in parallel also other work - the expression of feelings at a deeper level. This is - more.
4. Write a "letter of fear". Just sit down and take in hand a pen and paper (and it is better to try this case with both hands, not just dominant). And then release... That is not a filter, don't limit yourself - just write whatever comes. You have no purpose to understand this method is intended only to release fear from the inside out, so he could no longer run. And usually, it works fine. However, some more suited to the next option.
6. Draw your fear. Again, there is no purpose to check artistic abilities or to depict a specific image. Take paints and brush (or another material that is more like it) and just let them "dance" across the paper to the rhythm of your fear. The result, both in writing and drawing, you can then symbolically destroy - for example, to break or burn. But it is not required.
7. Divide the fear with Your higher power and ask for support. Trust the intentions of the Higher powers of You - and the fact that they are in any case harmonious. When You are alone face to face with the problem - it sometimes seems vast and insurmountable. If there is support in the form of a Higher power - The one in which You personally believe - it is always much easier to bear the burden of any liability. You can pray on the subject, to meditate or even write a letter to God asking about the division of Your troubles, protection and support.
8. You can also share your fear, like any other feeling with your loved one. It is important that from this very person You felt safe, and that for his part he was ready to listen to You non-judgmental and healthy. When You share your feelings in a vulnerable state with these people from among Your friends or relatives, this not only helps to cope with feelings, but also strengthens the level of intimacy and trust between you. In addition to friends, you can always turn to professional psychologists or psychotherapists, or in a special group.
9. In advance to accept any outcome. As paradoxical as may sound, but the principle of "Might better a horrible end than horror without end." also works fine. If requested to submit to anyone, including the worst option to live all the feelings about that and in the end to accept - the understanding that it is not fatal, then after You can look at the situation much more sober look and react much calmer.
10. To agreeing with him each time for one small step. Big global challenge might look unbearably frightening. But just to open the door. Then go through the corridor. To open a new door. Sit in a chair. To say a few sentences... When we divide large and complex to small and step-by-step - each of the actions begins to seem like more feasible. br>
Let Your inner world be the place of any feelings, but none of them will be the master and master - after all, this place is Your birthright! br>
good night all and good weekend! br>
PS: in the photo we with an older child go through the route of "Observation" in "forest Park" under Zadonsk last weekend. And though Egor climbed through all 8 stages 2-3 times faster than me, I also succeeded in overcoming fears and came to the bitter ))))))

Elena Stanislavovna
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