Often we don't think the impact of our words on another human being, especially when in life it is not all right. From the black band no one is immune. And if someone from your family has serious problems, it is important to know how to support it.

"Calm down!"

Why should he calm down? He has a problem which seems unsolvable at the moment. Your friend has every right to worry, but try not to be a robot, which is capable of clicking disable all emotions. This advice you devalue the importance of experience. Let's talk over a Cup of herbal tea. Another way is to be quiet with him, taking part of anxiety itself. And don't give any recommendations, no matter how right they may seem to you. Because you're a different individual, with their experience. Useful to talk to another, that during the conversation he found acceptable for the output.

"do"

nothing of the sort! It's all equally happy, and unhappy in their own way! Everyone has their limit, after which there comes pain and despair. Perhaps your cases are similar and some will be a little easier if they know someone this has happened too. But don't make it worse. Do not start to recount the details! Better sympathetically say, "Yes, I know how you feel now." A phrase you give a man to understand that experience with them and know what they are talking about.

"Time heals"

Excellent! What to do now, at this very minute? How to live until the time cure? Yes, and how much this time of need? Year? Week?.. Do not repeat platitudes! Formulaic phrases let the person know on a subconscious level that he's not interesting and it problems for you, a burden. Better to sincerely say that a friend can count on you.

"That stuff's not worth the trouble"

It's cruel! It turns out, is the problem that eats away at a person, you just "nonsense"! These words you're not exactly calm, but will only cause the fire itself. Your close will drift away and you're nothing more than won't be able to help him.

"Life is unfair"

the Killer argument, especially when the injustice at the moment only applies to that person. Abstract the phrase will not help and will not ease the suffering. Moreover, the frequent repetition of such language could lead to the development of the complex of a loser.

"You must survive this!"

this phrase is hiding a rebuke, a blow to the ego, doubt in the ability to cope with the problem. While extra stimulus in a difficult situation inappropriate. What do you mean "should"? To whom and for what? Now you have to be a support, not a cold-blooded teacher.

And how do You help loved ones trapped in a situation?