How to get out of the victim role. Last time I wrote about the triangle of Karpman. You have to put and enjoy written.

the First thing to do is to realize that you are part of the triangle. Try to understand and accept their role. To do this will not be easy, because I'm sure in your head there are a thousand excuses for what is happening, but it is necessary first of all for you. Running in the triangle is reminiscent of running in a circle and all would be good, but passes by "life". So how do you get out of the victim role. Nicely, this is a topic of psychotherapy, the underlying issue of personal boundaries. Anyone interested ,read my post "Border". N there are a few recommendations:

to Recognize that for everything that happens in your life be responsible it is you. It is the result of your action or inaction. Don't expect the fact that at one point appears aunt fairy and will save you. You are going to the prom, not because "stepmother" evil, but because they willingly sit down to sort out the buckwheat from the Fig. Stop thinking that the world is flowers and the rainbow, if you don't take care of yourself, for you nobody will do.

Understand you know best what you need, because this life belongs to you and you are not obliged.

do Not have to sacrifice, the more you sacrifice for the sake of another, the stronger punish him for it.

Remember it is always easier to suffer than to solve it, because while I suffer I don't want anything to do.

don't wait for people, "Miracle", identify their needs, and what they should do for you.
Write 10 paragraphs for that I love you, look and smile. You have something to appreciate. So begin to appreciate yourself while you do not do this to yourself, do not expect that people will spread out to you.

But what if leaving the role of "victim" you will become a "Stalker" .There is one important detail. The Stalker raises their self-esteem due to the humiliation of partner. But we're talking about forming its own borders. And people will resist, because if your behavior will change, they will have to change mine. The law system says: "When you change one element, change the rest". But you have a choice, always think about others or think about yourself.

Andrey Yanovsky
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