Consciously or not, we are constantly forced to make choices, including and with respect to its own autonomy. And it's not only reasonable, but necessary. I propose to try to collect the possible motives of why we do the choice in favor of lack of independence. br>
1. Not realize that do not behave as independent people, accustomed to put some questions to other people (remember the joke – "I never know when the wife asks: "What do you want for dinner?") br>
2. Have no motive to be in some matters independent and don't want to take responsibility. For a variety of reasons. Just don't want to. Tired and so overwhelmed. For "ideological" reasons. In the end, see no need, as spent forces do not meet the expected result. br>
3. Corny lazy and don't want to get out of the "comfort zone". Independence, as we have said, it inevitably leads to consequences that are understood by us as what we did OURSELVES. And it is us why, if everything is in some way "to resolve". Even if not very good, it does not always agree, leads to the fact that we become ready to change. Even dissatisfaction can be the usual "comfort zone". br>
4. Feel "incompetent". Do not believe that we are in principle able to solve the problem on their own, without the help of other people. br>
5. "Substitute/ confuse dependency with other concepts. For example, the refuse of intellectual freedom, to feel the care from the important to us. br>
6. Obstacles may seem insurmountable to us, the goal is unrealistic. br>
7. Don't know where to start, how to approach it. Elementary hard in emphasis (even their own motive of action), final goal, objectives and ways of achieving. The problem looks like an amorphous tangle no beginning and no end ("How to make a child more independent?" - is not this task)...
8. Afraid of failure, mistakes. Especially if we did not have a positive experience of autonomy in unusual situations. Especially if there are unrealistic expectations to solve all at once and quickly.
9. Feel insecure, worried that I would stay alone, without support.
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