Very often I hear at the consultation that "I do everything for your husband (wife), but he(a) doesn't appreciate it".

So it happens that in a relationship one partner exhibits an excessive concern about the second, constantly trying to guess what the partner desires, his needs, forgetting about yourself, pushing yourself into the background.

the Husband for this man in the first place. A situation where the boundaries of identity begin to blur, an emotional merger.

Turns out, I have and it is important that partner, I just do what it needs to dissolve in it.

this is what Many mean by "love." But in reality it is the dependent relationships.

What do they do? Emotional dependence gives a psychological merging it for some time it reduces anxiety, tension both. This occurs until then, until one of the partners will not attempt to get out of it).

Dependence provides certainty, because it is the partner decides what to do. As he says, so it will be correct.

But there is a risk. You become a "Supplement" to the partner, and not an Autonomous individual with different needs, desires, goals. Partner and perhaps you yourself after some time getting bored in this relationship, but discomfort, closely.

Especially so often happens when one cares, and the second only takes care (of balance "take-give"). In such relationships it is difficult to grow, to develop, to face new challenges.

Such phenomena often occur in parent-child relations. You can often hear that "the child is for me a light in the window", "the meaning of my life, without it can not live", "live only for the sake of the child." Parents are thus not living my life and trying to fill an inner emptiness feelings, continuous care for children, giving them all the resources.

Therefore, people make a point of living another person's life. And often expect him to return, recognition, appreciation, but it is not always followed, so there comes razocharovanie.






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