Many of us are taught from an early age to be strong and independent. It is broadcast in different ways: “What are you wimp?”, “Why are you such a crybaby?”, “You are so dependent, just like your father!”, “Why didn't you hit him back?”, “In life you need to be able to stand up for yourself!”, “you're our last hope.”

Usually this is a small child, which by definition weak, helpless, often whiny, and doesn't know how else to fend for themselves. At the early age of insecurity — is a huge reservoir of human personality. And when he constantly receives such messages, he learns to hide this part of myself deeper and tries to be a strong show. But this is false power. This is an external role, not an inner feeling. Yes, the fake force can also be lean, but to live so constantly is very difficult.

In adult life often pay dearly for this “force” yourself “strong” or his family. Heart attacks, addiction, alcoholism, depression, violence — frequent satellites “strong” people. Meeting with the impotence occurs in such a radical way.

The sad part is that this experience is transmitted from generation to generation, and the farther, the more it accumulates. The person did not receive a proper amount of support in childhood, most likely will require power and independence from their children. This is a vicious circle that needs breaking. This can be done through the acceptance of his impotence and powerlessness of others.

the Real power comes from powerlessness. If the powerlessness of the child was adopted, and he regularly receives the necessary support in moments of weakness and insecurity, he eventually acquires the ability to be resilient and strong in front of life's difficulties without support, or to organize the necessary level of support for other people. This is possible because it has confidence that, if he would come with their problems to Another, he doesn't reject it.

it's Amazing how much strength and inspiration comes when you accept your weakness, when you admit that you can't do something that some of the things you basically are not able to do. At this point it's like you lets race, in which you were involved, and released a huge amount of force that was directed to vain attempts to overcome something. Life regains its course.

the same is true for relationships. When we recognize the powerlessness and impotence of the partner in some matters, we gain the ability to be in relationships more authentic and to see the partner's whole and real. This gives the relationship a new impetus.

it is Important in therapy to remember about your impotence, and not only the client but also the therapist. The theme of loneliness is very much a feeling of powerlessness, which is usually suppressed. The client usually comes in moments of despair, and the therapist can get involved in the fight to save the client from loneliness (the same applies to any other client issues). And, having tried all possible and impossible come to the conclusion that he cannot save the customer. And in this place can be a meeting between him and his client. Admitting that they both can't do anything with this alone, and accepting their weakness, they paradoxically can meet and share the experience of powerlessness and loneliness. When this meeting occurs, the feeling of loneliness for a moment disappears. That moment lays the Foundation for successfully overcoming the problem of loneliness.

If You accept your powerlessness, then You will be at least twice as much space for meetings with Others. Yes, the meeting on the territory of powerlessness is more dangerous because of the greater openness and vulnerability, but at certain moments she is able to give much more joy and satisfaction than meeting on-site power.

I Wish You the ability to make their impotence. I wish You the strength that is born of this acceptance.

Статья выложена в ознакомительных целях. Все права на текст принадлежат ресурсу и/или автору (B17 B17)

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