Last time, the 2 threads do not let me think for a reflection on them, it's time.

Recently I met with a very close person to me, and suddenly smelled the past life, the neglected problems, minute and rushing past the pain that was not myself. And talking about alcoholism, about alcoholism of a man who lives near you.

And why not just alcoholic dementia, You ask? And I wanted to understand, and how quickly can it come, after all that mystery, we don't drink only on holidays. 

Dementia, this is dementia, You say, alas, it is not always associated with age. “Dementia” translates from Latin as “crazy”. And as a complication it occurs in many diseases. And alcoholic dementia, as we hear from the name, is the main reason of the long use of alcohol. And it doesn't make alcoholic dementia more clear and visible and identify it for a long time is not necessary, but…  I Want to understand its underlying causes and symptoms, to know why a healthy and talented person can become an idiot and unable to answer for their own actions, why there is a disintegration of the human personality, because it won't happen in one day. And if to look not at the symptoms (and damage tissues and blood vessels of the brain), and the inner, we see the slow change of personality, changes:

• behavioral responses
• emotions
• mental ability
• intelligence.

in simple language, we can see that people are constantly annoyed, as it fails to perceive the new, losing curiosity, closed in itself, as narrow interests and insomnia (sleeping for a few hours, and awake maybe a few days in a row), often in conflict and causing scandals for no reason, so can't recharge energy alone, or Vice versa, becomes maudlin and childish, as even completely missing a critical attitude towards their own behavior.  And if we add to this that blurred the boundaries of morality, that is, people constantly arguing, insults and humiliates others, creates a painful situation for his family, he exhibits skill and if he needs something from relatives, skillfully asks them for forgiveness and convinces us that scandals won't happen again, he's getting no matter what is happening around him. Some get uncontrollable gathering, are all that I see, to his home.

And this is only the first stage, the second – already there are negative impairment of memory and develops short-term amnesia is Korsakoff's syndrome, impaired ability to Orient in space, lost household and hygienic skills, i.e. he becomes incapacitated. There is a third stage. It's already a failure in the work of all organs and systems: the complete failure of memory, physical exhaustion, the destruction of speech and motor functions (shakiness and unsteady gait, tremor of the hands and feet). The patient has hallucinations, delusions of persecution, there is a disintegration of personality. These States will not yield to therapy, as functions of neurons have already been lost completely.

Here are the symptoms of alcoholic dementia, and it's scary, because we understand that alcoholism is a departure from real life, from her problems, from her bright colors, sensations and emotions to your closed little world, care from the inability to cope with heavy thoughts…

Alcoholic dementia becomes an ordeal for the loved ones of the patient, which he blames, showing aggression. Often on this basis there are scandals with the police intervention caused by frightened neighbors. Worse, when you get used to it already and the neighbors.

don't want to scare psychopathic States patients with alcoholic dementia, but the characteristics of call: inappropriate behavior, the final of which it is impossible to predict, tantrums, severe anger on everyone, rude to people, not only to friends, the desire to cheat. In the days of remission, when a person does not drink, these features are smoothed out, becoming almost invisible.

now, we have dealt with the symptoms of alcoholic dementia, and what? I want to try to understand why still people left in the alcohol, killing themselves. We understand that cases soldering or exposure to alcohol is quite small, people consciously begin to look for in alcohol recovery. What can't handle people? To answer this question, I turned to the authors, revealing the psychosomatic causes of disease.

Valery Sinelnikov in his book “Love their disease” writes: «Alcohol — it is a disease of the personality, and alcohol is a kind of “cure” for the sick soul. That is, initially, not alcohol creates disease, and a person has a sick soul. And he has a painful need to relieve their condition”. The author responsible than the infected soul of the patient. “His soul is sick. She is infected with a virus of fear and hatred, jealousy and resentment, anger and despair”.

Vladimir Zhikarentsev, viewing alcoholism through the lens of the question, of what use is all this, replied: “the Feeling of futility, emptiness, guilt, inconsistencies surrounding world. The denial itself”. The cause of alcoholism Vladimir calls the following: “Everything is meaningless. The feeling of nothingness, guilt, inadequacy and self-denial”.

Yvette rose believes that alcoholism psychosomatics may have connection "with emotional, mental or sexual violence in the victim's life. Either he's looking for a way to achieve illusion power, even if it is only over his own life, control and, especially, respite from the stress of his environment". She writes that “alcohol gives the victim a temporary free ticket from the stressful circumstances, it is a form of self-medication, coping mechanism, enabling them to face challenges without emotional pain”.

so, if we were to examine the psychosomatic causes of alcoholism, I come to the conclusion that the person leaving in alcohol, not able to cope with a difficult emotional situation, an ad hoc or continuing for a long time, but it was emotional, not able to find support or rejecting it, and found relief in the illusory world of doping, and departed this world on their own.

And return to where I began this article, with the pain felt by people near the person who chose the withdrawal from the real problems and joys of the present.

And what we see, physical and mental exhaustion, the guilt that he could not save, forgetting about themselves, about children, addressing the problems of alcoholic, indicates the direction and often brings friends and relatives of alcoholics, the sense of loss of self-worth and importance, the so-called ‘transference”. What he feels and can not make an alcoholic, all of a sudden, you start to feel people close to him.

And here is the main issue, and if I do something for ourselves, or are we going to live in symbiosis, he – to drink, and I – to save? Save, completely losing myself, my health, joy of life, receiving injuries emotional, but reading the above symptoms of alcoholic dementia, and physical.

However, worries about his own person instead of improving only worsen the situation: the alcoholic continues to drink. Why? And that is the alcoholic, if not continue to drink when his problems are solved: the care, regret, standing up to society, whitewash, etc.?

So maybe your partner, who has gone into alcoholism, without solving their problems, shows you that it is time to do them? It's time to look at the world, other people, and not to invest all your energy in the one who already chose a departure from the present reality, do you think?  If he sees no way out, so it might be worth it to him to show? To show that it is possible not to go to alcoholic dementia and to live happily and enthusiastically. Lately I hear more and more words – I have nothing to compare. So show me what can be compared to oblivion from alcohol. Yes, it's step, step serious step responsible step to itself, allowing the alcoholic until it is too late to think about solving their problems. But from afar, from his own life, but what an alcoholic withdrawal from loved ones to alcohol have chosen, it would not have comforted themselves with the illusion that he is with us, no, he's in his nice world.

most Importantly, I would like to finish this article: rescuing the alcoholic, try not to drown yourself!̉

Yours, Olga Pagina

the Psychologist of the psychoanalytic modality

Simultantest, psychotraumatology.