the Life and success of a person is largely determined by its self-esteem. What is this magic word? SELF-ASSESSMENT self – assess yourself appreciate. I value, what I stand for? And here – that I deserve what you deserve, and what isn't? What can, and what I can not afford?
How is our self-esteem? Where does it come from? First of all, it consists of estimates of other people - parents, teachers, and friends. If you are lucky and your environment there are people who approve of your actions, appreciate the success, support and comfort in situations of failure, believe in your abilities, you will develop a positive attitude, confidence in their uniqueness, value to your personality. If you often hear criticisms and comments in his address, the endless emphasis on failures and mistakes – hardly are going to appreciate their personal qualities.
this should keep the parents who want to raise their young children successful, confident individuals, able to withstand setbacks, the managers themselves in their lives.
for Adults people who have self-evaluation is already largely developed, it is desirable to remember one truth in this world nothing is absolutely unchangeable. If you are not too confident person, improve your confidence. Knowing that self-esteem is influenced by the external assessments, do not forget their "sieve" and "filter" . Not every opinion, every person should take into consideration. This will help to reflect on the following parable.
Parable of the ring
One day a student came to the teacher and said: I come, master, because you feel so worthless that I just give up. They tell me I can't do anything, do everything bad that I'm clumsy and narrow-minded. How do I become better? What can I do to make me more valued?
the Teacher, not looking at him, said, what a pity that I can not help you. First I need to solve my own problem. Perhaps then -- And, pausing, he added: - If you wanted to help me, I would shut this down faster, and then, maybe, you could have rendered help to you.
- with pleasure, master, - he stammered, a young man, again making sure that they have neglected, and his requests aside.
"Okay," the teacher said. He took the ring from the little finger of the left hand, and offered it to the boy, he added: - Take the horse that's behind the door, and ride to the market. I need to sell this ring to pay a debt. 3A is a need to help out as much as possible but with a Minimum charge of one gold coin. Go and come back with the money as soon as possible.
the Young man took the ring and left. As soon as he got to the market, he began to offer the ring to the merchants, who looked at him with interest, while the young man did not say how much he asks for it.
Hearing about the price of one gold coin, some laughed, others turned back to him and only one old man was kind enough to take the trouble to explain to him that gold coin is too precious to give her some ring. Wanting to help a Young man, someone offered him a silver coin and a copper pot, but he strictly followed the instructions not to sell for less than one gold coin and agreed to.
After the Young man offered to buy this ring to all who met him in the market, and they were more than a hundred, dismayed by his failure, he sat down: his horse and returned.
As he'd like to have a gold coin to give to a teacher, to release him from the hassle and to, finally, his advice and assistance.
the Young man entered the room.
- a Teacher, - he said, - I'm sorry, but you cannot perform your request. Maybe I'd get for the ring two or three silver coins, but I don't think I would be able to fool anyone about the true cost of this ring
- what you said is very important, my young friend, ' replied the teacher, smiling. _ First we need to know the true value of the ring. Get back on the horse and ride to the jeweler. Who but he can know it? Tell him you would like to sell the ring and ask how much he will give for him. But regardless of these prices they don't sell it. Bring the ring back.
the Young man got back on the path.
the Jeweler examined the ring by the light of candles, under a magnifying glass, weighed it, and said to the boy:
- Tell the teacher that if he wants to sell it right now, I can't give him the ring more than fifty eight gold coins.
Fifty - eight of coins? - exclaimed the surprised young man.
"Yes," replied the jeweler. I know that with time it could get around seventy coins, but if you need to sell urgently ...
the Young man in great excitement went to the teacher to tell what had happened.
Sit down! the teacher said, after listening to him. YOU LIKE THIS RING, THE JEWEL, THE ONE AND ONLY! And appreciate you can only be a real specialist. Why do you always want to make any ignorant immediately identified your true value?
And after these words, he again put the ring on the little finger of the left hand.