Control of negative emotions


the Negative emotions we generate from themselves, their perception of events. There is an event in our lives, that is, the outer world gives us information, we "processed" our perception and emotions, depending on which build their behavior.
That is, the scheme is this: the situation – perception – emotion – behavior.
What to do?
First, Understand that it is not a situation shape our negative emotions and destructive behavior, and our perception of situations.
Example: situation – the husband said, "Again, you didn't wash the coffee maker!", perception – "He's mocking me!", emotion – anger, behavior scandal. the
Second, you start to doubt your perception of events, because our perception is only our view, the conclusion of reality but not reality itself. the
different people Have different insights, ideas, perceptions, and so they have different emotions, different behaviour. Some live peacefully and happily, others are not. the
Conclusion about the situation we do based on their life experience, and this conclusion cannot be complete, since it is only my experience and it is very few compared with the life experience of mankind.
If I had the opportunity to learn 100 life experiences of other people, I would have found the most correct answer the most suitable perception. the
Third: you Cannot associate a person's attitude to you with his actions.
Never the actions of people not related to their attitude to us, and are always associated with their own reasons for committing those actions. Attempt of search of these causes allows you to stop associate people's actions with their attitude, so as it says about the attitude to us. the
Fourth: it is Impossible to determine the situation of any one cause – "He's mocking me!"... The reasons are always many. The combination of these factors influenced to this situation, "the husband said, "Again, you didn't wash the coffee maker!". the
Fifth: you Need to get rid of the valuation, the black-and-white thinking. Everything is divided into good-bad, dangerous-safe, ("fun-not fun"). You should try to see the nuances in the relationships of people in their actions. Not to divide them into good or bad, and not communicating with each other. the
Sixth. To change the life experience, (or rather the conclusion of life, which is made thanks to him) on the basis of which was formed this perception.
That is, after some negative situations, your perception of life is stratified into positive and negative outcome. Your presentation of yourself to this situation was one – "I'm healthy, I'm in control, to me people are good!", and after the performance was different – the man is not sure that he did not threaten that he will be able to control yourself that it will be a nice treat.
this experience (conclusion) can be changed.
In this post, I just outlined the items on which you can change your perception, touched casual ways to change the perception.
each item should very deeply understand. So in the next posts I will analyze each of these points in detail and carefully.

Machnik Tatiana
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