Offended in our society to be more convenient than evil. Comfortable and familiar, perhaps. Not really very fond of both, but the first is clearer somehow, because the position turns out like this - sacrificial. And benefits to be offended, is also greater. Because, if you look, you're so (or such) all help-all help, never refuse care, and they are ungrateful, don't appreciate. You're such (or such) is good.

But to be angry, there is no benefit if you think about it. Because a person who invests in a relationship the anger in our society is considered aggressive. Although, it's a different concept. And yet, this person initially becomes hysterical or the aggressor, in some (severe cases) a psychopath, and people aren't always going to understand if you scream, actually, or so just because evil. And if the person is aggressive, it is better not to mess with him and stay away from that. Not the case with the offense. When a person is upset, the other sort of needs him to survive, to guess, to apologize, to feel ashamed, somehow redeems (guilt). But it is interesting that in every presentation different: l you resent him or get angry, no right and wrong (for me).

Well, because angry and offended in different ways and with a different purpose: it is possible that the other apologized, atoned for, and ashamed, and then provide yourself so strong closeness, because wine is very good glue for a relationship. And you can be angry and take offense to labeling, to inform the other (the partner in the relationship, whether parent-child, marital, romantic, working, etc.) that want something from him, and he does not, but should!). And then we can expect that the other will realize, "well, he doesn't see that you do not understand?" or to formulate his offense through the demand: "I want you to...". The second method Jabneh, perhaps, more honest and kissimee)). It's about intimacy and relationships. About the contact with the partner, the desire to be seen, taken into account) And the first is about the belief that you can manipulate. With both of these ways to stay in the relationship, you can understand why it is so, why do you in such a relationship what I want. There is a place, where possible. Called psychotherapy.)

Kolotilina Victoria
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