Conversing in a friendly circle at leisure on the modern family, its role and purpose in human life, we began to realize that lately a lot has changed in these matters.
Previously without a family was simply difficult. All questions of survival such as security, food, shelter and procreation have been much easier with a family than a single person.
And such values as love, the relationship between two people, was not the first and will not serve as a motive for creating a family.
Our time has changed a lot, and many of the survival issues are now resolved even easier alone.
Now the family increasingly is created because it is easier to love one another and build relationships. This slightly infantile, juvenile motive - "a family is created, so it is easier to meet and have sex" is increasingly in demand. And family really performs this function, especially in the beginning of his life.
But love does not always turn into love feelings, without testing evolution, sexual needs too calm down. And what will happen to those people whose motives for creating a family out of date? And family as a way to satisfy them, is no longer needed?
Time unnecessary, a hindrance, and the other in her and not seen, it is easier to escape.
And we now it is very often observed in growing number of divorces in the early period of the existence of the family.
But not all families break up. And interesting to see what they keep, if as a way the implementation of the initial motives, it does not already exist, the question of survival does not solve.
I guess there is a happy family, even created to meet the love motive, which have been preserved. One of the answers is that the people who created them could love each other, and their relationship did not stop at love. And their relationship was transformed, and the original motives are transformed, and even the people themselves could somehow be transformed. The family, along with their creators had evolved and grown beyond the means to meet the obvious needs. She acquired the new spiritual dimension, becoming the forge of experience, in which man finds himself, the world, maintains and grows stronger, much study and experience reports on, at least a little enriching of all.
but those who are not lucky out of love to grow love? And among them there are those who saved the family. Why, what motivated them? Love did not work, but it turned out the experience. The experience is always there, but some refuse it, not knowing how to treat it and what to use and a welcome. For many, it becomes important for its own growth, even if he did not become at once a source of paired relationships. Such people are distinguished by their own non-use position, the inner desire for spirituality.
Then, when faced with difficulties and challenges arising in living together, a man takes responsibility for them as a part of his life, and not abandoning this part, as it receives, integrates that part of (the experience) in his life and is, therefore, a little richer spiritually richer. Even if the result does not change and does not develop a life together, a man grows out of his limitations and perceptions. Growing individually.
In fact, growing individually, changing alone, a person makes changes in the entire family system, and she gratefully responds. And the changes began as the result of his own spiritual growth, are picked up by family, and slowly change and the relationship of the two, they become wiser, warmer, and love, not what happened in the beginning, manifest as a result of spiritual growth, as well as to reward.
Vladimir Volkov, http://drama.do.am