Such stories are not made to tell. But I'll try.

Search group "Lisa Alert" has launched a flash mob #divinecaroline - under this hashtag you can and want to share stories from your childhood, a horrible, painful, shameful, paralyzing story of the attempts of violence or theft. br>
it is Important for two reasons. First, those with whom it happened, often feel alone, as if it happened only with them, as though they were some "bad", "did something wrong". Secondly, it is important to understand that from our childhood is still here, and we now have to protect their children should teach them safe behavior with strangers and with familiar people. Let's look reality in the face of hundreds of stories voiced, millions bashfully ignored.

this happened to me in 11 years. To grandma's cottage, where I drove, it seems, from birth, was a neighbor - smiling, humorous middle-aged man, who was walking with a small dog on the block, winked with Granny, I always wondered how you doing, about something talked with the children. Sometimes called for a visit when grandma is always fun, it's open. I don't know what makes me embarrassed, it seemed somehow internally unpleasant, though slippery and sticky, and I never agreed, although my grandmother treated him well and released (!!!).

One day I was riding my bike, and he called me over to his about of the street where a lot of abandoned houses. And began to give a hint, that I have adult, and they can earn money and grandma can't say anything and something. Were close, started touching and I was paralyzed with horror, I did not understand what was happening, needed to run but couldn't move even. Very disgusting to think about it, I was saved by the fact that he tried to kiss and it was disgusting so much so that I finally "let go", I hit him, pushed away and left.

I haven't been able to tell my grandmother (was afraid of how she will survive it) and each time watched her talking to him, smiling, and listened to it all in the same tone trying to joke with me like nothing happened. The worst was that one day one of the neighbors-grandma a playful tone threw him a phrase like, "look, tell me what you're doing under the guise of walking the dogs" - really it is, adult, really knew and didn't tell anyone anything?? There were a lot of girls like me. Although God knows what she knew out there.

These things. Don't know what happened to him afterwards. The first time I was able to speak about it only a few years later, when threw in the hearts of the mother, "you don't know anything about me". br>
This story was only one of the points, then everything snowballed. Thoughts slipped away, the impression was lost, for many years there was only white noise and flashes of vague heartache. My mind tried to protect me and blocked memories and perceptions, as if my life is not happening to me, I just watch some stupid movie. ... About how long I was physically shaking from everyone, even accidental, touch - from any sudden movements I was shaking until now. As later became depressed. About thoughts to harm herself, to disappear below me. About the feeling that it will be correct. About how many years later I happened to be in front of the accelerating car, and my mind just flashed "finally all as it should be," as I straightened myself and stepped back, touched just a little bit, and I suddenly felt that the car is really very, very hard. ))

I love life, I love casual stuff. Love my job and my husband. Now all is well, but this could not be, if things had been slightly different - I just pulled my profession as a psychologist is doomed to personal growth, come for this or not, but work a lot. Working with a trauma and need a lot, otherwise nothing - the soul is broken into pieces, he could no longer understand what are. br>
If you have Something - remember, repeat this thought: "this happened to me". Talking about violence if, about bereavement, about the scandals in the family and any trauma, no matter what happened: Not "I'm broken", and "I'm the guy this happened". You can learn to live a different life under the new rules, CAN be happy, loved, in love with life. You have spark, the gift of God, a sense of life - take care of her, Holte and cherish, carefully inflate. Don't let it fade away. Don't live in the thrall of trauma - use every effort to get out of its quagmire of its sticky web.

take care of yourself and protect your children!

the Psychologist Alice Nosirova.