When I hear the word culture, I want to get a Wii...


When I hear the word culture, I want to get a Wii. First, because you grab a gun too late, and secondly, because the Wii is one of the most important foundations supporting the balance of the world.

However, let's take first things first.



Some time ago, by fate I had to go to the movies. Not that I'm an inveterate movie buff, but somehow the thread being interwoven in a whimsical pattern, and here I am in a dark room... and before me the Wii.

Our Russian Viy, in all its glory, the great and terrible as worthy of asymmetric answer to Hollywood. They hang Negroes, and shoot a movie about vampires, and we are free Cossacks and the evil we have our own.

However, once we started to compete with Tarantino and make allusion to the "From dusk till dawn", it would be appropriate to film something about werewolves from the state Duma, or the mummy of the vampire, sleeping in a mausoleum.

But I was just estestvo.


the movie Itself made me sad and mixed feeling, consisting of a little bit of nostalgia for the past, black and white and have long lost the Wii, and every minute growing wonderment of new interpretations.

the Old Wii was really scary. He's terrible as a sentence. The first and only of its kind social realism Thriller that made several generations of Soviet children to scream in fear.

I was one of them, in their own happy and not frightened children remaining in the past of a great country. Stunned and frozen in awkward disgust chair, clenching his fists looked at the screen.

I didn't know that the chair should be the others.


I did Not know then what a terrible and totally alien to Soviet cinema a mystical tale filmed in order, from entertainment very far. Didn't know the Wii was a weapon of the revolution.

the Film was a sharp sword, which cuts off the alien builders of communism clerical ideology. A chilling reminder of what the nightmare people lived under the rule of the clergy and the obscurantist.

Wii sternly reminded that should weaken the class struggle and to put into your heart a drop of pity and religious intoxication, the mind will fill in devils and ghouls. And we didn't know that vampires are already here.

Today we know everything.


Now we know what should be the chair, how good the film is about reviving the dead, and what was Gogol's Viy. And in this knowledge is much grief because of this we now expect.

But instead of the expected horror get secondary replica of Hollywood blockbusters, which have long shelf life expired. On the topic of the day floored seasoning a La Russe and the primitive independence of the Cossacks.

this entertaining And Ethnography at first amuses and pleases the eye, gradually and with some jauntily exhibitionism exposing us alluring nudity paternal graves... but it's not that and it is not so.

However, bezrybe and fish Gogol.



And here's a skeptical gaze, similar to the view accidentally abandoned in the film the hero-the Englishman, appears in a parade of bizarre monsters. Metamorphosis, witchcraft and the terrible mysteries, able to cause tremors.

But we did not affected, as long as I had seen everything. And if previously we could bring to nightmares with a cardboard doll, now and computer the miracle is not impressive.

Though should give credit to the authors imagination and skill of artists, designers, and specialists in special effects. All very high quality and catchy... but somehow without a spark, without a soul... without hell in his eyes.

what do without them...


anyway, as for the new reading, Gogol there and spent the night. The feast of the postmodern, where the causes are mixed with long-term consequences, and all is possible because all true.

the Story, in the author's view of mystical, fairytale-like, but quite obvious, full of inner logic and having a clear story, turns into a bizarre banter. Or incoherent phantasmagoria.

Like us today, all these little Gogol's witches, transformations, and banal demons from rural tales. We are adept in matters of the occult, it will not catch us. Give us the geography of the underworld.

And here it is before us.


Hell, according to the authors of the film, is in Ukraine, clearly appealing to the old Imperial complexes of the Russian intelligentsia, crying about the loss of margins and dreaming of the return of the Crimea.

of Course, Ukraine is inhabited by the devil, and the woods swarming with impure force. And if would not have her under the mighty hand of the great older Brother, and would be lost forever Cossacks, shattering under the power of Satan.

besides, every free Cossack is proving to be a vampire, and every woman a witch. Which is consistent with typical Russian notions of moral and intellectual qualities of the neighborhood.

So the people watching with delight.


However, a fair share of latent xenophobia, characteristic of all modern domestic films, and not alien and I dare say most Gogol, complemented by a strong anti-clerical message.

If Gogol seminarians, future priests and philosophers, are being comical and a little bit unfortunate, but essentially good, then the authors of the film, the accents are different. Students-seminarians there just assholes...

But the priest is a real executioner. Simple Orthodox priest, seemingly quiet and simple, is the embodiment of hell, collecting all the worst that can be inherent in the people.

turns Out, the writer we have is not so simple.



Strange that the broad Orthodox community, often tend to be offended at much less, this races as a mouthful of water gained. And no one is in hysterics on the Central channels.

deputies of the Duma, meeting in extraordinary session, not to discuss new amendments to the law on mass media and do not want to ban sex and give the priests a service weapon.

And even a respected Minister of culture somehow does not require to withdraw Gogol from school libraries. However, maybe it is a pan of the Centurion ordered them to keep his mouth shut until after the Olympics.

an hour is Coming, and we'll show...


Surprisingly, no-one knows who actually was the Wii. The terrible ancient God, or a loathsome devil, around which all the fuss. However, it is Gogol, he is a senior demon, and in the new film all the same God.

And he really is God. The Wii, or VAIO, an ancient Indo-European God of wind. Wind-wind, you're powerful... this is it, words from a poem the essence of the introductory part of the spell turned to God and arousing his invisible power.

of Course, he doesn't have seven horns as the Beast of the Apocalypse, and the age of reaching into the earth... when ancient images they are also very long. The wind blows, covering his tracks and hits from all sides.

But the free Cossack was not afraid of the wind.


the Cossack, there's nothing to fear, because the Wii is the deity of battle. And from the root it's not just Blizzard and the howling, but the war. The God of wind, weapons and thunder are not merely a free spirit, but also a source of unprecedented power.

Wii Lord of lightning, is the true Lord of hosts, the God of free and terrible in all its manifestations, customs and Affairs. This is good with his fists, the eternal desire for freedom and the power to protect her.

And yet, this God of truth. As the wind playfully rips off people's clothes and opens the window, and the look of the Wii begins to see the truth. Can't hide no vile thing, not the glorious feat. The Wii makes a secret revealed.

the Cossack, not shy of the truth.


the Cossack was not afraid of the wind, because he is like the wind. Cossack blows where he wants, live where he wants, make friends with whoever he wants, beats who he wants, when the time comes to fight. In this sense, the Wii the essence of the primordial Cossack God.

the Wind-the Wii is the free spirit of the Cossacks, the soul-bird, not knowing of the chains and flying aimlessly... and they look at the Wii often myself. He is interested in her own inner world, hidden behind a veil of age.

he terrible hypocrites. Freedom and appeal to their own values, his loyalty and unyielding desire for truth - the essence of things is fundamentally incompatible with the world of the kneeling slave.

They drove the Wii.


So when I hear the word culture, I want to get a Wii. I want a great and strong wind broke the window, and swept out of our minds the habit of perpetual slavery. I know he has not left us.

And very soon will come, appearing in a thunder storm...


I hear his footsteps.

He's here, he's close, he's already at the door.

Here it is.




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