my name is Oxytocin! Heard of me? I a hormone of attachment, which gives you a feeling of comfort and safety around other people. You a nice touch to loved ones and to spend time with them? It's my job! The touch of hands, massage, kissing, sex, childbirth, heartfelt conversation with a friend - all of this pushes my button. br>
I need you because in this huge world it is difficult to ensure the safety of yourself alone. However, I stand not always, trust we all can have a negative impact . Therefore, in the course of evolution the brain is tuned to study the current situation and not on blind trust to everyone. For example, when a person approaches the horse with a treat in your hand, both in disbelief at first study each other. The horse is usually afraid of strangers, but at the same time wants to get food. The man is afraid to bring her hand up to her powerful teeth, but he still want to establish trust. Everyone scans the situation and when both realize the other is not a threat, there comes a sense of comfort. In a similar way happens in relations between people. br>
of Course, I have a dark side. The constant feeling of trust and comfort can distract you from the development of the necessary skills. That's why my lifts should be alternated with my downs, this is important for your development as an individual. Yes, sometimes you can rely on others in order to avoid frustration from their inability to do something, but you cannot do this always. You separately, too, must be worth something! The right solution is to strike a balance between the desire for social support and achieving their ambitious goals.
Habits to create a new oxytocin chains:
Mark, when you have a feeling of trust and distrust. In the case of mistrust, ask yourself the question: the fact that this person, group or suspicious in my negative experience?
Gradually build relationships with new or ambiguous people. Make small steps first exchange of views, then a short exchange of comments about the weather. Do not fret,do not expect quick results, and not try immediately to please a man. Maybe he really is not worth trusting too much, but at least you can relax in prisutni this man. I think this habit is suitable for the relationship to work or study.
Be worthy of trust, and note, when you trust, it affects your level of oxytocin, regardless of your reciprocal confidence.
Create your own control system of relations of trust. As you can understand that this person is trustworthy? What actions, statements, nonverbal manifestations strengthen your confidence?
wherever possible, allow yourself a massage. Hug their romantic partners, parents, children and friends.
the Article is written with L. G., Breuning "happy Hormones"