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Hello! 🤗 I've decided to write a post with such a peculiar name for a number of reasons.

In recent years, especially as my dependent clients many times gave me this feedback, they say, saw you and thought so young, light, fun, happy girl, well what she could help me, she didn't even smell, not something that is not injected, is not lying in the doorways, etc.

And then it takes a month, two, three, and, Oh!, some changes happen and even the most stubborn client can not acknowledge that advice and they are inevitably the question arises : "Katya! How do you do it ???".

I Want to give a simple answer, firstly I'm not doing this, and the client, all the changes is primarily to his credit, his efforts, his promotion! ✊🎯💪

I, as a psychologist, only create necessary conditions for these changes were faster and easier and this is just my light and cheerful energy helps.

And secondly, my lightness and gaiety partially achieved many years of working on ourselves, and partly is psychological protection.

that doesn't mean I'm lying or pretending, just psyche works so that when she is overweight, she begins to defend itself as it may, one of my ways of protecting is to get in on the fun. 😄

And if this happens unconsciously it can hurt , unnecessarily difficult experience just replaced, but do not go anywhere and accumulate, and then the person explodes and everything.

And if it is to realize, to notice, to manage this process, there is nothing wrong with "fun" , as in protection , including I do not see.

🔴 And the second, that led me to writing a post is that I recently read the data of a large nationwide survey on the topic, what would a psychologist you probably went, which looks happily, it is easy and carefree or whose face says that he suffered. ❓⁉

opinion is divided strictly in half, 50% said that of course, the psychologist needs to look easy and carefree, otherwise how can he help if he loaded problems, and 50% said that of course the psychologist must suffer much in life, so that he could understand the pain of their clients, the only way he will be able to help them.

🧐 And that's what brought me my reasoning, I believe that the truth lies, as usual, around the middle. On the one hand it is good when a psychologist looks easy and happy and not the impression of a very troubled person.

Indeed, the psychologist needs to be worked out, well enough to know yourself, to accept yourself, to be able to cope with their difficulties, to have enough self-support and a good attitude.

the Presence of this all, almost automatic, allows him to look easily and happily, well at least most of the time. ☀💦🌈

on the other hand, good psychologists often behind there is the experience of severe trauma, stress, crises, rannaste, etc. he should Have experience of access to that part of it, where lives the pain, the devastating things from the client in order to join him and to get him out of this hole.

And if not, then:

a) such an expert is unlikely to be able to sincerely sympathize with the client, to be with him as if "in tune"

b) it is unlikely that he will become an expert as such, because professional formation of the psychotherapist, it is quite a long and difficult journey that requires a lot of effort, energy, time, money, and, if the person does not have adequate amount of motivation to walk this path, know yourself, love yourself, and then to help others, he this way and will not do.

And self-motivation most often is born out of self-injury, some pain, sadly.😔

So, to sum up, a good specialist is usually the person who had traumatic experiences in childhood and it is because of their curiosity and interest in his personality, caught myself, worked out well for many years, through pain, tears, joy, discovery, awareness, and eventually began to look easy, fun and happy 😊🎈💃

But if it is good to look at him, somewhere in the corners of your eyes, you can see traces of the pain he experienced once.

So when I can suffer and can be fun - I'm happy! Because I'm different ! I'm still alive !☺

#psychologisation #psychologocal