There are opinions, that's okay, sugar, I was brought up, thought otherwise convey, I don't hit – I bring up, grow up and say thank you.
it is Important to learn to control his anger. Back off, calm down. If you can not move, breathe deeply and count to fifty. Say: "I'm angry, I need some time". Reassured, at least a little, you will be able to consider other options to solve the situation.
Parents want their children to listen the first time and did everything as was told. And of course it is easier to raise your voice or hit, thereby using fear to force the child to do something. But a free man who is able to make a choice, may not obey all that he said.
of Course, living in a family where your opinion is ignored and the requests are not met – this is not normal and not possible.
- Therefore, relationships need to be build.
- Therefore, the relationship must be trust.
- Therefore, the higher the word must be meaningful. You are responsible for your words, unable to argue. If you, at some, point can't explain, to tell and to argue – you honestly admit it.
- You use "no" only to ensure the health, safety and psyche of the child. If you say "no" at all – it loses all meaning. (Once I was walking down a rural road and saw a child throwing stones into the swamp-lake. The mother reported the child in the form of order that this cheerful game an urgent need to stop. The child asked "why?". Mom never responded, probably because why not. I still tormented by the question: so why not throw stones at the swamp-lake. Question: why is this child in the future to hear her "no"?).
From a moral point of view hitting a child is a pretty simple question. It consists in the fact that the child is less and will not change. Therefore, people rarely beat other people, which is twice larger than themselves. The other adult people will either fight back or go to the police and the issue will be removed. I liked one example cited by a psychologist Dmitry Korpachev in his training. It is suggested to replace your child in someone else's bull, and teach him a couple of triple-teams. If the Terrier is not going to listen, to try to slap him. Bull Terriers animals are serious, they will not forgive and the desire to raise the hand will disappear.
I Recently, quite by accident, talked to a stranger dentist the Internet. And for some reason, I have held the following dialogue (punctuation original):
HE Belt the best motivator)) I once helped
I Beat that
HE ass with a belt. But to reach the mind which is not – Yes the correct way))
I mean – do You often beat other people? You often beat customers?
HE – No, of course
I Did you do not irritate your customers, at least sometimes? Did they all "have a mind"? So what's the difference whom to beat?
IT Is all theology))) Its possible.
I expressed an unfamiliar dentist regret that he was beaten in Detva assumed it was hurt and angry and asked him to talk about it with someone. The result is a strange dentist mad at me, accused of inadequacy and "disappeared". But what dialogue? About the continuity of violence. That not always people suffering from violence can understand where is the border that is worth doing and what is not.
Can you beat the kids? No. Impossible to beat, to slap, give a slap, to give to the Pope. May not be reasons that would justify physical violence.