It is impossible to love!


".... I over the years got rid of 20 kg Weight was 93 kg (in summer I very much like )), and now  not like you.
Clothing life black. Lack of confidence annoys me. I feel like a fatty. Whatever is put around the fat, although I always pay attention men, but I don't need it. Everyone says I look good.
Tell me, please, how do I love myself? After birth, a very severe stretch marks and, accordingly,-   large Breasts now hanging. Although my husband never said I was ugly. Never heard from anyone such words, but my self-esteem through the floor...”

Why do people take off the pounds? The classics: feel healthy, confident, like myself, to wear beautiful clothes....

But really is much deeper. People make it out to:
▪️to avoid unpleasant thoughts and emotions (fear, anxiety, shame, guilt, etc.);
▪️he did not meet his pain, reality and not take responsibility;
▪️improve your confidence and self-worth, love myself, be free and happy. 
Pounds to throw! It would seem, live,
and be happy. Oh, no! Does not work. Still no pleasure themselves, faith in themselves, values of joy and happiness, and being “fat” did not disappear... So maybe this isn't about weight? br>
Know that people dietchiki there is a relationship of self-esteem, self-confidence and self-esteem of body weight. The lower the weight, the higher these parameters. And Vice versa.
when you consider that the weight of the dietchiki this is a permanent “swing”, the internal parameters also shakes up and down. And it definitely affects their mood, relationships and quality of life. You probably already guessed, and felt how that feels?!
Many people are already a little bit enlightened, and realize that in the story called "fighting weight" they lack of self-love. But how to love yourself insecure with self-esteem below the floor, with the extra weight, stretch marks and drooping Breasts? Kaaaak?
the problem is that most of us are deeply convinced that we can't love yourself just like that. And we are not to love just like that, not for something, but simply to love. You also believed? 

How such notions of love? In childhood almost each of us has learned by heart: to be accepted, loved and not rejected, “I have to be “good”, “perfect”. To do it right. Not to be mistaken. Please everyone and do everything, and all is well”.

And if we are overweight (read ‘lazy, weak, sick, unsuccessful, poor) and imperfect body (stretch marks, drooping Breasts), that such to love yourself it is impossible! And others, even if you say you love, then most likely lying. Bad and imperfect love we do not deserve and are not worthy! Understand where the dog is buried?To love yourself truly, without any conditionalities, it is important to stop to struggle with weight forever to lose weight, because it is pointless. Energy and strength merge wasted.

Importantly, start to clean up the mess inside. To change the underlying negative beliefs about yourself. And in the process it is important to understand who I am is true, to allow yourself to be different, with their own desires and needs. A man who makes mistakes and gets his experience in life. Continue to grow yourself...

Then the belief will come self-esteem will be independent and adequate, the rod inside will appear, life will become not scary. Love starts with yourself.

Blog "the Psychology of slimness"

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