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jealousy, like other passions, has its quirks: people are trying to hide the fact that they're jealous now, but bragging about jealous once and is able to jealous to continue. (Francois de La Rochefoucauld)

As you understand, today talking about jealousy.

Jealousy is a complex of experiences that occur in a complex psychological structure. She is always accompanied by such emotional reactions and States as hatred, anxiety, anger, despair, doubt and suspicion, different behavior, which is difficult to be transferred by the jealous, and those for whom jealousy is directed.

the Jealous man will always suffer from this feeling. And the key to the absence of suffering lies in the feeling of jealousy.

so, what I can understand about themselves, feeling a sense of jealousy?

  • their Level of self-esteem. In this case, the low self-esteem that creates doubt in yourself. People do not believe in their quality and dignity, does not believe that they can admire, does not believe in the uniqueness of his personality, thanks to which the companion of his life chose him (his favorite jealous J).
  • If there is an issue with self-esteem, it also raises the question of the value of self. If I give in to a potential competitor (if any), or worry that it may appear that I devalue myself as a person with my set of qualities. And here a pertinent question: "how much I appreciate myself and you know all your valuables?"
  • I see love object as his property and so you want to bend it to their rules and stipulate that, in fact, difficult to perform. I'm jealous, because this man belongs to me and nobody has the right to it, and he has no right to communicate with others. And I don't understand that accusing a loved one, although the problem is not him, it's me. As a rule, it is difficult for us in this confession. And then you should also understand that this belonging is conditional. Many people want to belong to each other, it is important to consider the degree of this affiliation. In such cases, I propose to compare himself with a toy: do I want to be treated like a toy, i.e. a sense of ownership like a toy from your childhood that nobody else can touch, she's mine.
  • I'm not confident. The other is always more! More attractive, more competent in building relationships, more skilled in the intima, etc., and therefore can be more interesting.
  • I don't trust. And it is important to understand I don't trust, because I can change myself, or I don't trust because I have had the experience of cheating. If I can change myself, I blame the lover for his actions. If I cheated, then I can't blame people for the actions of others.

Honestly after talking with him on the subject of jealousy, each of us can understand the cause within yourself. Understand the reason, we can help ourselves make the feeling of jealousy, realizing the root and not to direct your jealousy at a loved one, not to torment himself with suspicion.

In a truly loving heart, or the jealousy kills love, or love kills jealousy. (Fyodor Dostoyevsky)

And finally: many of us are flattered when we are jealous and we sometimes provoke in it their favorite. If it adds spark to your relationship, then live with it happily.

Anna timofeyenko