Model behavior

by the Way, this is one of the favorite manipulations of our Russian women. We are successors of the enlightened West, we have not and will not shovels bigotry and East of the neglect of women's freedom and identity... Right? Right. This "poor Muslim women" let them walk the streets in a burqa and dress up for her only. We have all the way around! House – no, not the Bathrobe, thank God, has outlived its usefulness, – pyjamas, tracksuit or jeans with a t-shirt. But on the street we wear a mini! And heels! And if you do not wear a mini, then we emphasize the neckline! We will flirt with the colleagues and friends, happy to catch yourself intrigued glances of strange men, go to drink coffee with "well, you know, my classmate", etc. And proudly to trace the reflections of the emotions in the eyes of her husband: what do you think? see, I'm still very, very popular...

And if the husband suddenly oppose in one way or another at least something of the above, we declare it the owner and a jealous fool. After all, we had nothing in mind when so here he laughed a good joke... someone else.

In General, the goal is to get a man to be nervous on the kidney of jealousy even, but just needs allegiance. Somewhere to hint (poluosoznanno or even without reason), but somewhere in the forehead to declare: look, I'm completely unable to have relations with someone else.

And it is believed that a man should "cheer up", suddenly and acutely conscious of how he loves this woman, as she cherishes, and to embark on the path of the invisible war with potential competitors. Plus along the way, to prove the Queen of hearts: I'm good, I'm still very good, choose me, you-when you are me, bird of happiness for tomorrow... How to prove? Well, listen, there, gifts, conflicts to iron out, not to fan, who knows the ways...

Maybe a couple of times and it works. But then, and sooner rather than later, is extremely unpleasant for all participants in the events thing – emotional burnout in the context of relationships. There should be? And here, for example, imagine you're living in an apartment, which, as it turns out, expect other people. And any reason for such claims they have. And you start the battle for housing. You have a lot of strength, eyes burning with righteous fire: this is my home, I live here, I will not allow anyone to take away! The family is rallying, fighting because common. There is a court, then another, and another. Third-party candidates appear new and new. Sometimes they – the applicants – are changing. And now, five, seven or ten years, you live under threat of eviction... When you have in mind for the first time will crystallize the idea: can well it on figs, this specific hearth, if he has mine, but in the future will go to someone else, and all around is so difficult? Do not rule out that some learn to get the humor of what is happening, adapt to the situation and so will live the rest of your life. But will it really cozy and comfortable, safely and securely from home? "My house – my fortress"?

each person has the need for loyalty partner. Deep, deep, base. This – value. And we humans tend to perceive threats to our values in the bayonets as outright aggression. From whoever they proceeded.


No woman is not a thing, not the property of men, she doesn't belong in the kitchen, etc., and there is no need to hide behind a handkerchief, unless required by the chosen religion. However, the word "loyalty" in our time is somehow not very popular, and the concept – even more so. We are not going to be like the people loudly screaming about the fall of morals (at any time in any country these people are, and they look are usually not very). However, it has come to be interpreted too narrowly: I am faithful/loyal, if I have no sexual relations with anyone other than official partner. All. And thoughts, hints, fantasies, flirting? No, really, it's a private matter, nobody's business...

In this environment we grow up in this environment are formed the ideas of what is normal and acceptable and what is not. We are surrounded by posters with calling women. Want to be beautiful? Be sexy. And to be sexy – well, you know what that means.

Plus, someone once let me say the young girl: he pays little attention to you? make him jealous... Oops. And the first reaction of the young jealous man will fix her car, which then germinate in the manipulation of betrayal.

unfortunately, women often use this manipulation, men especially often run or walk especially sweet. What? "After all, this source is still not really my..."

Another topic that should definitely cover – this story is similar to that described in the first example. When a woman spontaneously flirting is not just in search of confirmation of their attractiveness, and with conviction says: sorry honey, I love you... but I think not only you!

as the consultation comes to women who are "tired of the gray days of marriage", "was not enough attention to the husband," "wanted to plunge into the raging ocean of feelings"... And there are – you know, at desire it is possible not only to find, a long – standing suitors interested colleagues, new Internet friends... Someone confined to a lyrical conversation, someone starts the meeting and to pace... And then start suffering because I can't do this with my husband! and I want to... And feeling that cheating is absolutely out of the ordinary, the woman nonetheless suffers and goes on a very dangerous edge. Because the apotheosis of this manipulation, which, fortunately, very few people reach, is, in fact, is cheating (and, subsequently, perceived or not, the death of relationships, men tend not things to forgive, and by and large, irrespective of conscious attitude, the unconscious attitude they always have severely negative). Well, for example, as the culmination of the manipulation of health – statement of terminal diagnosis.

the cause of this drama (as, indeed, many other dramas) are covered, as usual, in the family and in the culture. My mom acted like this, now I repeat after her, that's strange? Well, plus the widespread blockage of the brain (wanted to write "young", but in actual fact has not quite young) Hollywood, saying that love is the only Mur-Mur-Mur and Marcianise. And if there was a "R-R-R-R", salt, pepper, and mustard – all, sorry, love is over, you need to look for a new love. Somehow a lot of people considers difficulties in the family sign of the end. And this is – no, not the beginning – so the twists and turns in the story, without which there would be no story and no book of your life.


Here we need first of all work with beliefs and attitudes (see chapters 31, 32). I feel an inner protest at the thought, for example, that you need to abandon wearing any revealing clothing or flirting with cute colleagues?

I Think that the attractiveness of women is measured by the reaction to it of men?

I Think that is useful to the husband to tickle nerves, and jealousy is the spice in the relationship? That's it. It is topics for study. Perhaps you have some idea of "sexual woman" that you'd like to meet (and which – please note – slays all the men on the spot)? Then it makes sense to work with him as an object of dependence (see Chapter 33). But if you notice that you are often thrown from one extreme to another (that I'm a depraved she-devil, chaste nun) – that's a topic for merge splitting (see Chapter 34).

just remember that your relationship, love and future together – a good enough reason for change. Moreover, they themselves change for the better.

© Alexey and Maria Afanasieva, Svetlana sonnet, Alain Yara

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SONET Svetlana
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