1. Psychotherapy is a process of interaction with the same specialist (psychologist). Before beginning this process it would be nice to choose the right person. There are a few questions to ask the specialist. For example: what education do you have? Did you do individual therapy? And supervision?
2. Quick changes will not happen. Instant enlightenment too. Even the trust does not occur immediately (and that's fine, you need to look at the person to test it for safety. You never know what door it is written "psychologist"...).
3. If you are lucky, some insights will arise during the session. But probably the most valuable thoughts will appear in between meetings. And they, of course, no relation to the writings of therapist does not have (joke).
4. A few meetings later, you might want to be friends with a therapist (to marry him to be adopted). The therapist seems almost perfect – attentive, sensitive, understanding. This is called "positive transfer". Finding a lot of sympathy, just remember that you are meeting for a special activity. It's called "psychotherapy". The therapist should be attentive to you. He listens to you. It's a job. And friendship is the same movement in both directions. In friendship therapists are human beings. You can grumble, too late, to complain, to be unhappy and unsociable...Think you need it? And discuss it with a therapist.
5. After some time, your therapist will begin to annoy you. You'll be late for the meeting, keep an eye on other therapists, cancel the session or to hurt/to run away on urgent business before the beginning. So may manifest resistance to change. Treat him with respect. Your psyche long years had grown defensive mechanisms that you have lived to my age in one piece and now you don't give them as easy without checking new ways of behavior and feeling. Discuss these feelings with a therapist. You learn a lot.
6. Sometimes the therapist will remind you of mom/dad/grandma/teacher, etc., With all the ensuing experiences. It's called "projection". Tell the therapist about your feelings. Be sure to listen to the answer. Then try to unstick the fantasy from the real person sitting in front of you.
7. In the process of therapy you'll remember many situations from my childhood. There are many different (mostly bad) feelings for mom/dad. Remember that these feelings are not from you right now, but from the child that you were once that young woman/man, where was your mom/dad. So take care of your current already-in-the-age-of a woman/man from their claims now. Poyasnaya feelings in the therapist's office.
8. After some time you will want to end psychotherapy. If it's not resistance to change, you will not be difficult to come to the last meeting to Express gratitude and say goodbye to the therapist. (Remember, when you leave without saying goodbye, does this mean a living person – your therapist).
9. If your therapist asked you for permission to seek supervision for your occasion – do not rush to think about him bad. On the contrary. You are very lucky. You have found a real professional who cares about the quality of their work and recognizes that it is not omnipotent.
10.If you changed a few psychologists, and only that, you helped, so the others did a great big invisible work in preparing you to the changes.
11.If your therapist once a year goes on vacation, that's fine. But if twice, then it's super easy! And warns about this in advance... And if this all complete, he is ready to take you to the designated and agreed time – then you are lucky. You got a good professional, doing well in life and with borders. And that means that you, too, so maybe.
12.Most likely, after some time your loved ones will tell you that "this is your therapy worse you did." It's because people have learned to listen to myself, to sort out their feelings and wishes, taking responsibility for their lives and the state will want the same from others. You will be uncomfortable, because you'll learn how to take care of yourself, not load on more than willing to bear, calmly say "no"/ "I'm not ready to continue a conversation with you in this way"/ "I need to take a break to listen to myself." Well, a couple of catch phrases.
13.Do not expect that after a course of therapy in your life will cease to happen conflicts, trouble and other pain. Will. Just treat them you will be more stable.
14. And another thing: they say that the duration of therapy is determined by the depth of interest of man to himself.