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it So happened that Tuesday was traditionally a "male" day: at the reception of four men. I usually do not take the advice of the day more than three people, you need to restore the resources to deeply analyze the situation of each client, mentally switched on and switch.

But there are exceptions, yesterday was a case in point. Eve was called the emotionally overwrought man, and begged him urgently to accept it, convinced that the matter is urgent. His voice, I realized that actually, he needs urgent psychological help, understanding and sympathetic companion. Therefore appointed him later than the others to give the opportunity, still, to calm down a little and tune to work together. His story briefly and I will tell you the latest.

on that day, the first was Oleg "Skylark". Oleg is very deep, vulnerable, it is a wonderful combination of masculine and feminine. The male part is emphasized by a massive, brutal figure, high efficiency, early independence and responsibility. Perhaps he's one of the few who the first time took responsibility for the therapy process and for his family. The female part gives it emotional sensitivity, gentleness. I find myself thinking that when talking to him, talking very quietly, almost a whisper, melitele, waiting for a longer pause.

the Family life of Oleg reminiscent of the swing: the desire to leave the family, the love and affection to wife and children, once again giving it back. We work the longest (more than six months), he carefully performs assignments, they reflect what is happening and, finally, there is hope that you can become happy.

the Second client is also a man - Denys, already two marriages, with third wife, as he says: "temporarily" gone. Each subsequent marriage becomes shorter than the previous one, each subsequent wife was less wise and thoughtful than the former. Immersed in Denis in his relationships with women, trying to understand the reasons for the removal from women, inability to build an emotionally intimate relationship. School psychologists will immediately understand what lies behind unsettled family life, but the relationship with my mom. Will be a difficult task to keep love and trust to her mother and to realize the destructiveness of her installations, and to learn to live and think in new ways.

the Third was Maxim - successful, wealthy, appearance of actor, arrives from out of town, carefully keeping from friends and acquaintances chat with a psychologist. Maxim concerned about the cooling of feelings for his wife, he wants to keep the family together, but to live in the emotional cold and hunger are no longer able. The cooling off of feelings is also connected with the lack of ability to set up a lasting emotional connection. With Maxim trying to awaken and reveal his emotion, trust to his wife.

And finally, the fourth client - a Eugene. From the first seconds of communication, once it becomes clear that emotional arousal - the infidelity of his wife. To sit Eugene can not constantly moves around the office (it is very common for clients experiencing emotional arousal). His narrative is inconsistent, the brain explodes, he does not understand, how could she... what to do. For several weeks he would not eat, not sleeping, alcohol and sedatives do not help, his life turned into hell. Eugene is constantly engaged in imaginary dialogues with spouses, before eyes there are scenes of infidelity. With such a deep and relevant emotional trauma, I propose to work with metaphorical cards. His story becomes more structured, the emotions subside slightly.

frankly, I began to understand men, only when started counseling techniques. I see their experiences, sufferings, aspirations and desires to preserve the relationship, to be happy. In the office they can afford a tear, talk about their fears, to be vulnerable - no one will judge.

take care of the men!

P. S. the names are fictional, the history is typical.

Elena Bazanova
2018-08-22
Статья выложена в ознакомительных целях. Все права на текст принадлежат ресурсу и/или автору (B17 B17)

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