"That the children will grow up and I'll divorce you!"
Familiar?
Never say those dreadful words aloud or in a whisper, not at all.
Why?:
Because Your child will not grow. He will remain to bear this maternity a curse, because it is a terrible weight of truth: grow - will lose family, will not grow - the eternal child will be.

novarossi How many adults have you seen who my family was not able to build, from parents to stay away, and live on the side of life her parents, being the glue between them?
In the end, neurosis child. And let it for 30. But he has no life.....

"You're like your father!" or "All the good from me and bad-from my father!"

Familiar with this?
And never say aloud or in a whisper, not at all.
Why?:

For my daughter, you are both the most important and significant people on the planet. Isimportant!

this message is also a terrible burden of righteousness: I will go in a man's world and you will have it well-you're not my daughter, will stay with me and loyal to me-will forever lose credibility men and will suffer in the relationship as I am.....

Also in the future shines neurosis when you can not do on their own, and need to fulfill a mother's Testament....

"Stop whining, you have to be strong!"

And this too familiar? Also kind of innocuous sounds. Seems like it would be something to cry: think, hesitated. Get up and let's go further. Think the dress on the doll broke, throw it away altogether. Think, left her alone for half an hour, you were at home, nothing happened. Think.....

And the child thinks..... Yes. He thinks that his pain is nothing. Thinks his feelings are worth nothing. He thinks that mom left me alone in the punishment for being badly behaved. Thinks bad to show tears. What tears are evil because they push mom from you.........

And what's the choice? Cry will push close to you, don't cry will freeze your heart...

"I know better what you need!"

And it is also a terrible word. For moms this growing child comfortable through the suppression of his will. It will mean a loss of initiative and withdrawal in dependent relationships, the depreciation of his desires and switching attention to Another.

In adult life is also fraught with neurosis-how many repressed desires that are not even recognized and are not eligible to be how many repressed feelings of anger/wrath/hatred towards the mother that it is important to keep and to save face, the Good girl.....

"Our dad found another!"

This is a terrible message. To involve the child in your adults games Men and Women, to show him that he can't see and run on "most interesting place". What do you think in this situation, when the child you are calmer, you are not alone, you have support (a child of five, hmm....), forgetting that he is dad to daughter and for you Husband. And daughter at this point ceases to be living and becomes a tool in your hands.....

And the child a choice without a choice:

+ will grow up and get married, he'll get Another

+ will not grow up and get married, and I will fight for my dad with other women

+ will rise/I will find and throw those who belong to the world of traitors....

a child will play the rest of the parent script in their adult life with their real partners and to attract such suitable for this role only because it dragged and chased "the most interesting place", were not given the opportunity to see through what is really going on.

Note that in this scenario, no choice: Parents, it's your game and I have nothing to do. Sort it out yourself, and leave me alone. I have a Child!

"You have to be better than I am!" or "I failed, you will succeed!"

it Seems harmless, and from the heart, right? But something is wrong. Fonit something....not Success, not Success, not Happiness....

of Course, this message mother wants her daughter "only the best" and from this very good leaves her daughter with him. Otherwise, she can at least bask in her Success, Luck, Happiness?

A daughter? Daughter is necessary to turn off on another road of life, or rather, my mother, and to start first in those areas particularly tense, where mom did not work....dance, gymnastics, competitions, sequins and costumes, the message, "do not eat!....you diet!....you can't have that!"-actually belong to herself and daughter here again a tool in the hands of an adult.....

Well, if the crisis of 30 years the girl will burst and it will send it all together with my mother to the devil for a long time, and she would buy a motorcycle and fly to travel, photographing the landscapes and the microcosm, which she missed all these years......and if not?....

In each of these Epistles is a choice without choice - that is so bad that different too bad, past their own desires/feelings/meaning of life....The child learns through you such behaviors into adulthood has itself does not leave a choice.

Please think about what you say, Mom!

Every word you say you just "the bird flew" and for a child it sends to the world his immature childhood fantasies, full of unknown and frightening. After all, you are on the ground at least 30 years, and he is only 5....

P/S 1 for the List of messages remains open. Here is only part of the......

P/S 2, Not all messages lead to that result......