All want to meet your soul mate and be happy together.
That's just the epitome of this dream differently.
Sometimes after the suppression, other remaking under him, just under his vision.
As you know, a psychologist come in pairs, which alone to be completely happy is not obtained.
as often come to me a couple ( married, in an open relationship), I can assume what “is” on the way to their dream.
- Constant criticism of partner
it is Difficult to consider the relationship happy if the other one is constantly "nagging."
This is not an equal relationship.
More like the interaction between mom and baby.
my Mom is constantly unhappy, irritated. Or dad only does that niggles
"You stay at home all day, I couldn't get rid of?"
not taken Into account objectivity - wife the whole day with two toddlers.
- Contempt
Often it manifests itself in sarcasm, ridicule. Perhaps because one of the partners wants to increase its CDA.
This is also a relationship adds joy.
And even lead to reception to the psychologist, as people over whom mocked, starting to feel insecure. Can decrease self-esteem.
unfortunately such treatment is not uncommon.
- Balloon defence
Can be expressed in the words:
" I'm all right. You need a psychologist".
very common. A client comes and says that the other side at the joint consultation doesn't want to sign up. He was all right.
it does not happen. The two necessarily conflict. Two with the "cockroaches", I mean with their ideas, attitudes.
Here, of course, is more complicated. Maybe it's a psychological defense to criticism, sarcasm, etc.
want to understand why there was such a defence.
- wall
Here one partner from another fenced off, not to hear him. Deaf to his needs, interests.
There can be various reasons.
From infantilism to narcissism.
As you can see, to build a more or less harmonious relations, the desired work of each spouse ( partner) over their inner world.
This work will lead to the ability to hear, to understand, to accept, to find compromises in case of disagreements.
What is the basis of family relations.
I'm not writing here about love. Love, feelings to each other a priori.
I put emphasis on something that destroys the feelings ( or rather changes the sense of love and tenderness, others hate). Unfortunately some of the couples comes to hatred.
Sometimes you can hear this:
-I loved him very much, and now can't see...
As I wrote earlier, love can be remained, only the feeling of hostility at the moment "flooded" everything.
As always ready to answer your questions.