Older than the woman, the less men fit her :(


Once, when summarizing the passage of one big training course, the participants are almost in unison asked the presenter: "And how are we going to build relationships? Where to find men? We had not each one was coming, and now even more so!"

Green I was, therefore, not immediately understand what they were saying.

Yes, on the one hand, "developed", grown-up psychologically the woman is easier to establish contacts, communicate easier, faster to find a common language, can solve conflicts, and so on and so forth.

But on the other hand, this woman clearly understands what she wants (so there is less suffering and openly, and confidently declares his interests and needs), is aware of its limits (and, again, less suffering and knows their boundaries to identify and protect), it is easy to give freedom to his partner (while a great advance of confidence), but the same freedom and right to their privacy (personal space, personal time, personal space in the apartment, personal interests) and leave.

This seriously reduces the number of potential candidates for her hand and heart. Because of women working on yourself (with the help of psychotherapy, trainings, and just books) much more than men. This composition of groups (psychotherapy training), where 10 women 1 man, and that's a rarity.

It is not talking about women that work on a need more, and men and so OK (and just waiting for women to them will grow). It's about flexibility of mind, about who is more ready to change, and it's about who is more brave to change their habits, views, and relationships with others.

Therefore, men who want to grow up, at times less. But to build a relationship with someone who is behind you is forced to become a teacher, "mom", but such a desire is already there, after all: "How long does it take to pull all on itself, including relationship?!"

So there is some truth that the more you work on yourself, read all sorts of clever-intelligent books, to be formed, the harder it is to find a man.

Yes, someone in the result is generally obviate the need for constant man next. Sex is always possible to find, but in terms of intimacy, the need may have been seriously reduced (e.g., because of decreased necessity at the expense of another to raise their self-esteem, on the other to warm his wounded soul).

But this need for proximity may remain (because they want to have children were a complete family, to have someone around with whom you can share, with whom you can be vulnerable and open, which will support, because strong people also need support). But this need may remain unmet is the price that you may have to pay for its "well conceived", for its growing up.

There is not some sort of morality and output, just a statement of fact, for someone sad.

Sergey Avdeev
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