Our goals and desires. Want, but do not.


Motive is what motivates and directs human activity is the driving force behind behavior, which consists of needs, interests, appetites, and emotions. Activation motif creates a certain trend in the action. During the implementation of the motivational process, man transforms the initial situation into desirable. Achievement motivation - desire to improve results, dissatisfaction with achieved, perseverance in achieving their goals, the desire to succeed, come what may. Speaking about the high level of motivation, mean confidence in a successful outcome, finding information, taking responsibility, perseverance. But initially there must be a desire - it forces us to do something. It is the desire of man is to move on to action.

there Are situations when it seems the desire and motivation all right, and the desire to do something: with myself, with relationships, with feelings, with life in General there, but then suddenly found a strange thing that embodiment is conceived what is lacking is the desire. There are excuses, there are no forces, time. And like how to do it, to whom and why this is a separate issue, and no particular desire. And here begins the customer requests about how to implement the plans, where to get resources and do not self-sabotage. I'm not talking here about procrastination (delaying important cases), here, about their personal desires. After all, if You really want something, You need something really right for You, You turn around and do it, despite the difficulties and obstacles, sometimes even forgetting about sleep and food.

Let's look at the basic errors in formation of goals and in recognition of desires, and how to fix them:

1. The tool is desire. It's just that when we have to force ourselves to literally force it to carry out some desire. And if you look closely to such a strange request, it turns out that it is only a means to achieve its goals. Remember those are Your goals and desires, to realize that You did not succeed. Try to answer the question "why do I need it?", "Generally, it became clear that I want it." You will most likely find that You want something else, and it is only a means. Now when a true desire is discovered, it will be Your real goal and this understanding will give necessary energy, as if the final picture. And think, maybe there are still some ways to fulfill Your desires, causing You less resistance.

2. The claim is tasks that take energy for transformation, instead of what to give her. The message "You're bad, you're bad" does not give any specific direction, and only causes shame, guilt and despair. Therefore, it is necessary to reformulate the claim into tasks for development. If You are dissatisfied with yourself or the way You act, think about how You would like to change that. And aspire to it, realizing the ultimate positive goal - it becomes much easier.

3. Too the global objectives, which turn the target into a dream. And it robs us of the time we spent in fantasies, without giving any motivation to action. If I don't have intermediate goals, I have no access to the joy of my success, and without it, the long movement is impossible. Therefore, if the aim is ambitious, then think about what You would like from the next year, what events, changes and acquisitions that will bring You to your destination.

And the main thing I want to suggest, is to abandon the idea that in order to be happy, loved, successful person you must become perfect and fit a certain template. Listen to your heart and identify your true desires!

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