I am pleased with the fact that an integral part of the life of the modern psychologist is to participate in various conferences, forums, workshops. For me personally, the participation in such events is formal and routine. This is an opportunity not only to promote information, to Express their point of view on a number of contemporary and classical issues, but also to communicate with those people who are interested in obtaining and sharing psychological knowledge, techniques, methods. Job psychologist gives advantages: popularization of information can be useful other people. In my understanding, is a “ripple effect” is part of the personal experience, thoughts, rules that respond to other will they support, help, relief.
This spring I was invited to the workshop, organized by the children's center with whom I work. the Organizers asked to explain key moments of interaction between adults and children in everyday life. In the end I got “reminder adult” participating in family education.
checklist for adults
the first Paragraph. The process of raising a child always assumes the presence of certain psycho-pedagogical knowledge among parents. unfortunately, in some cases, the family itself can be a source of adverse, uncomfortable States of the child. For example, if there is a mismatch of temperaments; the mismatch of needs and desires (both current and long term); use behaviour patterns, strategies and techniques of promotion and punishment, which were effective in previous periods of a child's life (but in this period they are out of date and inefficient, and therefore “not working”).
So, if raised in a family there comes a time when parents have more questions than answers, then it's time to reconsider their views and experience, learn new effective strategies and techniques. The needs of the child are constantly changing (because the child develops, therefore, a way to interact with him have the same change). And so the process of finding answers to new questions - one of the most important and challenging aspects of parenthood. I support the motivation of parents in circulation for support and assistance to professionals working with the child; to the specialists in mental health; to those whom they believe experts in the field of parenting; and also to other people whom they trust. It's about the fact that nurturing, growing together "qualitatively" - acquiring and applying new knowledge and experience for the benefit of themselves and the child.
the second Paragraph. The process of raising a child depends on the parents ' expectations and their possibilities to adopt a child. Accept the child for what he is, not the way I would like to see parents – very hard psychologically process. Each parent will have “the way your child’ is normal and natural. But it is important to recognize and distinguish between the fantasy image and reality. There are subjective perceptions “the child”, which are influenced by personal history, dreams, fantasies (both about the child and about yourself as a parent of such a child). But at the same time there is a real, live baby living with his parents. And if the parent "image" suddenly “destroying” living, breathing child, we often adults this divergence is perceived as a “fault” (child) that needs a simple fix. And correct: make, encourage, forbid, closer and bring the child to his image. But when unilaterally parents are introduced to the world of the child with their stereotypes, attitudes, beliefs, forcing him to only something of their own, thus they say to him that his world isn't interesting (and the child - not the same, i.e. not correct, not valuable). Sometimes parents might think – they want to fix? Perhaps the features of a real child that do not coincide with the ideal ideas. So, in my opinion, it is better to understand your child and act on his side than “fix” and “cure”.
the third Paragraph. Parents are role models for their children. the Process of raising a child includes teaching social skills, the acquisition of practices in everyday situations, which is not learned the rules (not using the notation and the moralizirovaniya), and through the imitation of the behavior. And the primary task of the parents - by their example in daily interactions with society to show the family lifestyle. Child, every day, in various conditions of watching the behavior of parents. Do you support each other in difficult situations? How to cope with stress? How often does your family staying with joy? How do you prefer to spend leisure time? What qualities do you appreciate in friends? These and other questions in a similar vein, will help you understand whether your actions, which every day sees a child, the image of parenthood that you think and say?
will Sum up a little. Parents underestimate their influence children. Education – it is always a bilateral process, which imposes on parents specific requirements. For example, conformity to the standards of culture of behavior, a healthy lifestyle (because children copy not only positive but also negative mental and behavioral patterns of the parents). It is also important to once again emphasize the fact that the situation in education is important do not impact and interaction. If the process of education brings more negative emotions and results, the adult, it is important to understand the reason. For example, in front of the child are unrealistic goals? He doesn't know of alternatives. Or he (or you) lack experience? It is a thoughtful, deliberate interaction provides more opportunities for cooperation adults and children. And if the family has the value of the relationship, it is a huge resource that supports both the child and the adult.