Today I want to write about my favorite topic of self-development.
Often at sessions, hear from customers, especially at the initial stage, about how they changed and what are the other. Just at the beginning, because those who in self-development linger on a little longer, you begin to realize that they know so little about myself. And if he himself is not clear, then how can we evaluate and judge other.
I Ask the question: how do they understand what has changed, on what grounds?
usually you hear the answer that they now all know differently. There is also a nuance, but as they realized that another does not understand?
Here is hidden the zest of self-development. To understand that man is the inner transformation is possible only by external actions. Don't know, learned, mastered and began to apply some new skills.
Already apply internal understanding: What I want to do and what I do. What result want to receive and whether my actions to this result.
That's where the changes begin. For example, in the relationship a woman accustomed to command, suppress, hysteria and order. These reactions lead from the environment in the relationship. On the contrary, lead to the struggle, resistance on the other hand, from the partner. In the best case will be breakup, the worst disease of children, someone of the spouses and destruction. Because of these habits the family system becomes sick, it is toxic.
When asked of the client, and what you want-that relationship was? Hear: I want love, respect, care, attention. These are the qualities that man wants in a relationship when interacting with others feel is his area of development. Only, sometimes, it starts even more interesting process. Want to get the unchanged myself. I am what emerged from their environment, culture and upbringing of the parents. Change is difficult for me. And here's another let changes and becomes "good and easy".
Such statements also hear: "Why do I always have to change?".
Well, at least because you came to learn something in life to change. And it you don't like how you have relationships in your life is going. Here the law of one work, all you want to another, first give it yourself.
Note that life speaks to us very clearly through a situation in which we find ourselves. Life does not speak the language: I was wondering something about you understand. Life speaks to us through situations, which develop from our actions. Passive, did not want to do, okay, live alone and never will be, no achievements, no money, no success, no family. Don't like start to do new things and life will create a new situation.
this is self-development.
I Decided to write about it, since this is my development area. Earlier it was difficult for me because of its subjective world to display their professional exhibit. Worked for the habit that someone more "important" and more professional put criticized my text. Until the beginning through actions and routine execution, through want, to perform. Stopped talking, it was more to do. When it was already easy enough to do it, then it's an internal understanding.
the Understanding that by and large no one cares what I write. It is important and necessary to me as self-development. However, this does not mean that my text is useless. Someone may be a resonance with me and my text will be the next or final, and perhaps initial puzzle in his mazayka inner world. One small puzzle from thousands of important others. A very good way to develop a sense of self-importance.
the One who devalued or criticized within themselves or through the external action of my text that this is his area of development. So sensitive inside it: " well written, Well sees. Has that right. But my reaction is that it has to do with me. And this is my self-development".
I Understand that you need to respond to what a person makes with themselves, with others, with your life. It can beautifully about understanding not decompose, and in life to make beautiful. Then think about his level of development "And I know how so?"
this is my text can be in order to try to look from another angle for those who think that lags behind the level of self-developing. Then you can ask yourself the question: "And not with your pride now familiar".
Self-development is happening every minute of our lives.