Tell me about the most important!

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Sometimes we are approached by parents to talk to children about important events. On the death of loved ones, Pets, that a pet, for whatever reason you need to give out of the house, the divorce, moving to another school and so on.

My position in this case is this: tell the child is loved one, parent. Or substitute parent. It's his responsibility.

the Child needs to hear information from the native person. The child must know and feel:

You are ready to open;

- that You trust him and love him;

- are You ready to cope with the emotions of the child, because do not hide them from him;

- are there for him in difficult time for him and you have contact;

to mourn grief is important and necessary (it is important to understand the difference: to mourn, doesn't mean your emotions to hang on baby or to leave with him);

- just tell me yourself cry, then for the manifestation of the feelings of the child will not be punished.

After: and in sorrow and in joy, in health and in sickness is not only about husband and wife, it is in General about family.

"what, then, does the psychologist? - You will ask. -As always tells the client to take responsibility and washes his hands?"

No, a psychologist does not washes his hands. He is responsible for your work front:

1 stage. Helps parents deal with their feelings and how to tell the child about complex information, how to maintain it, when it is necessary to bring to therapy (if any changes). In extreme cases, can prepare your child to talk about a difficult topic. For example, if a dying cat, tell, that when animals become old and often sick, their soul leaves the body and goes to live on kosakow the planet. There they live a very good and fun. The best option in this case: make up a story for a child.

2 stage. Working with the child, if changes in life affected him negatively. Also supports parents how important it is to behave.

stage 3. Working with parents themselves, as is often the child's condition depends on the condition of loved ones. Is your mom or dad to deal with their feelings, to understand what's behind them, often automatically changes the child's condition.

So, dear parents, come to therapy not a request: "Tell me" and asking: "Help us to survive, to live".

Tankova Oksana