If there was an Oscar in the field of disturbed parent-child relationship, the main categories would be "ungrateful" and "I don't love you anymore".
Gratitude is a form of recognition of parents who are given birth to and raised. And bad when she turned into a charge laid on the altar of parenthood life. Such payment constitutes a waiver of his choice.
The worst thing for a child to understand that he is unloved and that it is not necessary. For the sake of loving and accepting the child is ready to sacrifice themselves.
the Girl or boy grows up in a family where cultivated honoring parents. While the needs and desires of the child are not taken into account. About the weaknesses and mistakes of the child in the family do not want to know. The child is thisnot between the requirement to be respectful, good and their self.
If the girl or the boy will be disagreement with a parent decision, will be punished. It can be as physical punishment, threats, shouting, and emotional coldness, rejection. Following what you come up with a child - his sense of guilt for his bad behavior and fear.
a Child learns from such examples to show the proper respect and gratitude to parents. In contrast to Express to him the disrespect and irreverence.
what do you think of such a relationship work? And how about this child?
When most parents of children accused of ingratitude? When children go to their own decision different from the parent. Gratitude is a form of obedience of children to parents.
Parents have the strongest power over children. The power to influence and decide. Such power often involves unquestioning obedience. While the child is small and is not ready physically and psychologically to take responsibility for your life, obedience is justified. When adult man as a sign of gratitude and respect is not able to make their own choices, independence postponed indefinitely.
do you think what is the purpose and the meaning of parenthood? Take care of the children, raise and educate them? No, it's a feature. The purpose and meaning that the child learned to be independent.
When respect and gratitude to the family consider obedience and non-resistance to the will of the parents, it creates a slave thinking. I want to please you, so it will be not only mom and dad. This style of relationship the child will bring to other areas of your life. Bosses, authorities, partners, husbands and wives, friends, children of their own. Either position top or bottom. Another example, he does not.
the Change starts with the realization that a child is not property of the parents and not the continuation of the arms or legs. Can't a child learn gratitude, respect, if not experienced them myself.
Parents bring children into the world. There are no alternatives. And it cannot be repaid. But the biggest thank you to the parents is how happy you live your life.