apologizing may seem like a simple skill, but it's amazing how many insincere apologies and false forgiveness.
What is apology
Often people apologize just proposing "peace." The easiest way is just to say "Sorry" and move on. You can call it “instrumental” apology because it's only a means to achieve some selfish gain (peace of mind).
Other people just stick to the idea that you need to apologize, because it is necessary to another person. This leads to insincere apology, such as: “I really don't understand why you're offended, but if I somehow offended you, sorry.” This kind of apology like a bad compromise between the need to apologize and the desire to defend their own point of view.
the Main problem with this apology is that they are insincere and do not perform the function for which they are intended.
After receiving such apologies the man who feels resentment, will hardly feel more understood than before, and is unlikely to experience more trust in the person who apologized. In the end, undermined the trust remains undermined, despite the fact that the differences were formally removed.
the Power of words of izbienie
Apologies, but when they said correctly, can strengthen relationships and restore trust. They can cause another person to feel a deep understanding and care can lead to true forgiveness.
an Apology is merely the latest step in the search process of understanding why someone is upset. This expression of profound sympathy. The person apologizing must imagine yourself in the place of another and understand how the other perceives his actions and how he feels in the result.
This means that you need to dive into your need to absolve themselves of blame, and we must be able to accept that their own actions have caused pain to the person.
Then a request for forgiveness is the greatest act of humility with the goal to share with another person the pain, humiliation or sadness.
of Course, apologetic can experience the greatest feeling of guilt or shame for their actions. And in this case, to bring their genuine apology becomes even more difficult.
However, not sharing the feelings of the offended person, it is impossible to sincerely apologize. People need to see that you apologize out of sympathy, not out of a desire to get rid of their unpleasant feelings. Only then your apology will be most likely on an emotional level, and only then it will have the desired effect.
Only through this humble experience of separation and the pain of others, you can receive true forgiveness.