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Why advice of a psychologist often not used

When people seek help from a psychologist, for example, wants to advice of a psychologist online, the more often he expects some very specific instructions concerning behaviour in a specific situation. And even if he receives the recommendations, it does not mean that he will follow.

- Why? – you will ask. This happens for several reasons.

first, the important role played by the fact that advice of a psychologist free are not binding. Even very expensive things, a gift received, are valued much less than things purchased with great difficulty. If I had not paid for counseling, I do not seek to obtain from it as many benefits. It is a fact, as if you weren't the only supporters freestuff, both the one and the other.

secondly, often free advice of a psychologist and paid advice doesn't fall into the expectations of the client and his idea of what exactly to do in this situation. It often happens that a man wants from a professional expert to hear the confirmation of the correctness of his position, and everything that does not fit into his worldview, he rejects. Moreover, the psychologist who decided to help "Trilussa" in such a situation may "bump" on ingratitude. To pay that was not paid, but the assessment given at the Maxim and of their views: "Why not help? Why didn't I feel? Why didn't you tell me what I wanted to hear?!"

third, let's say, the client agreed to implement the recommendations and honestly it did. Here on the way to positive change the next obstacle. The fact that human behavior is 90% of habits, so most of the action it produces on the machine, bypassing the stage of thinking and incorporate it into the stereotypical behavior of new and unusual. Typically, when a new meeting with the psychologist the man says that he tried that the mind can understand, but still sometimes lost control and acted in the old way.

This is because it is very difficult to quickly change the stereotypical ways of reacting that have evolved over the years. Largely to think sensibly and act hinder us feelings. There was some event, and the first thing we have senses and immediately respond, without thinking. From there we got familiar with all the expression "Strong back mind". And we all know that parental admonition, "First think, then do". But this is possible only in the case when there is such a lot of negative feelings that overshadow access mind. No wonder also say: "Distraught" or "Demolished "roof" with joy."

here and need regular release or discharge of accumulated feelings, which also may not necessarily happen through a paid consultation.

Together with Julia Vasyukova

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