In this article I want to talk about one of the main demons of our time – the Devil the rapture and its relationship with apathy and exhaustion.
Many of us were taught: "there is No word "can not" is the word "can't"". Loud message to Soviet teachers, raising the bar of the state: "Faster! Higher! Stronger!". The era has changed, and social perspective on the possibilities, not so much. There is no demand with drinkers and chronic patients, all the others are infected with the virus castigators.
In therapy I often encounter a surprising phenomenon: resistance to the discovery of their own resources, strengths, talents, giftedness arises from the idea – "if I can do that, you will certainly have to implement in life." The opportunity becomes a duty to the yoke.
As for me, connected these seemingly quite disparate things: their own limitations and their own talents? And how it in turn related to depletion? Now I'll try to illustrate.
In a society where children's achievements are measured, it is difficult to resist the temptation not to test the talent of the child in their own interests. Not to put on the chair for five-year-old Sasha, are able to learn by heart the boldly buzzing Fly and not to show his guests. Because of the attention and admiration and fall to the parents, and if it is not possible to obtain otherwise, the private memory along with diction limp, childhood, where all is forgiven for the initiative behind, and extraction from relations – an impossible task, the giftedness of the child becomes a kind of family idol. Tacit collusion is: "We will see you, but only if you show us what we need, and all the rest of your symptoms, not so in our opinion honorable, we ignore". And the child accepts this reality, besides the other had not.
What happens when a hypothetical Sasha comes from? He has a sustainable way in order to be seen: great to do something for which he has received the approval. Many years received. And from different people. Approval, once slowly, so quietly has become synonymous with the word "be". Once upon a time contact has been lost with their own desires, and developed exactly what was supported by the environment. Time passes and the power is very developed parts of stops. Even Olympic Champions. The person is left with nothing, realizing that he was cruelly deceived: the others in fact do not care about his achievements. He might find himself on top of a mountain and terribly lonely. Or, if he's lucky more only way to the top, where, for instance, and enjoy life is virtually nonexistent. This discovery fork:
- to turn from this path, but then sort of betray the efforts invested in development, to betray fanned hopes for happiness, and maybe (no not guarantees) to finally find himself, his timid voice desires, in which, perhaps, no talents;
- or to meekly trudge through it, not having the opportunity to meet with disappointment.
Away from himself, the man with a puzzled discovers that his investment is not multiplied, the course changes not in his favor, the default is rapidly devours all invested, but like a gambler, again and again plays dice with fate. Great, if you can see that the con has long put his own life.