an Interesting point arises in long-term therapy - when the client is faced with the fact that the psychologist does not understand it. Sometimes it seems that the psychologist does not understand. Sometimes really do not understand. At this point, the client handle DISAPPOINTMENT.

Sometimes a little disappointment. Sometimes a huge and dramatic. Depending on the weight previously hung on the psychologist's projections. And here the most interesting - as he is going through this frustration and what he's doing.

In real life more often, we increase the distance with those who are disappointed. Sometimes even torn all relations. Or just lose interest. And there is no possibility to stay in this and understand what happened and how it happened, and could it turn out differently...



In the treatment of such a possibility. And recently here the client is experienced as a rejection. In dramatic play: no one understands me.... and you, Brutus, too... that is, the lack of understanding is equated to rejection. And in fact, the client rejects at this point. And here we find ourselves in the cave of Aladdin: so many fun and important around here that doesn't know what to explore first.

it May be that for customer relations equal to the merger, the relationship is only possible if we understand each other perfectly, if we have similar views on things, and we ourselves are alike. And if the person is different then relationship impossible....

it May be that from childhood we are accustomed to the idea that to understand well and not to understand - bad. And if you don't understand - you, if not bad, certainly not good enough. Not understand - a shame. And even if the psychologist is not ashamed (well, they are still - shameless companions), then it becomes a shame for the psychologist, for his misunderstanding, that he is near.

it May be that for the customer is very important to its uniqueness and otherness. He carries it like a flag "I'm not like everyone else, I'm different, and.... I am alone." Kind of waiting for confirmation of his loneliness and "extraterrestrial origin". Make sure that even your psychologist doesn't understand me.... Or even a psychologist-the man does not understand me (even if the male psychologist, he's a man, and it is not treated). And then very interesting from the disappointment in men. Or rather, in whom the client is disappointed.

This is an important moment in therapy. There is much about yourself to understand, to notice. It is possible for the first time not to rush the experience, to remain in him and through him to save the relationship. To find another point, which is usually all broke down, and it turns out you can stay and continue together to build something. Leave the illusions, not the person.