I Have a very non-standard settings - I'm a psychologist working with issues of body and weight, and I have a big height and weight
I work with married couples, divorce and crisis - and I'm not married
I Have friends , girlfriends and loved ones , and I feel alone
And , like you ( perhaps) , I also sometimes feel like the Apple on the counter with exotic fruits . And sometimes I wonder if I'm right , and I - normal (practitioner, female, daughter, man - you need to substitute )
the Sense of otherness is when I think first that I am a good Apple . Normal is average , popular producer and variety . Without much flaws and deviations from average quality .
And then , next to the Apple on the shelves is banana and passion fruit . And Apple becomes suddenly exotic , or even illiquid ( suddenly )
And long to find the flaws in themselves ( the Apple, Yes ) . And to think - what's wrong with me ? Why am I such a color, shape and I have no such flavor or a special way of eating ? May be something wrong with me ? Maybe I have a defective copy of the passion fruit ? Maybe my family was bananas, but they were so long that my appearance has nothing left from these ancestors ? Maybe I need to be silent, and then I just take a normal Apple ? And there is someone who recognizes me as the same sort of apples , which were loved in childhood , and grew on the tree at grandma's . Or is the Apple that my dad gave my mom on their first date , and her friend bit into a piece, to hurt and hinder ?
But I have in this world, then apples buy . And eat. Find their delicious and beautiful and your favorite fruit . It is the apples. Exotic bananas , and God forgive me, passion fruit
On average my perception of normality , and the perception of themselves and others affected by several important factors :
- my needs at the moment ( divided into basic food, work , housing ; and quasi-needs - development in the career, oysters, an expensive car )
- education in the family and the installation of my surroundings, the idea that I was taught while growing up - what should I be
- past experience ( because the experience of otherness , often, is the experience itself "not all" in certain circumstances , and written to the memory through the senses , usually not very pleasant . It is also possible bodily reaction to a repetition of the situation in the present tense )
the Experience of otherness and abnormality also familiar to people who have questions or concerns about the issues of identity and sexuality . In this area, in the process of education, we instill a lot of units that can disturb, frighten and cause severe shame in adult life , especially if I violate these postulates .
a Good solution would be a revision of their environment. What the people around me ? Do I feel comfortable in their condition "here and now" beside your partner, friends and colleagues ?
And the main question : whether the truth I'd be happier if I was thinner/fatter/younger/prettier , if I'm gonna get these people ?