to QUIT, OR….?
Why quitting Smoking is called “quit”? Following the logic of the language, if a person starts to smoke, you have to finish this process – “to finish Smoking”. If he throws, he needs something to take, accept, or assign. Nobody says: “I got to smoke at the age of 19” or “I kept the habit of Smoking, 16 years». Such language cut hearing.
In my practice there are cases when the wording “quit” has become a stumbling block, complicating the reason for quitting Smoking. Once customers have decided to quit Smoking, they started Smoking more and found a lot of reasons, reasons and excuses to postpone ‘moment” the next day, Monday, significant date. With growing anxiety, loneliness, powerlessness and despair. They fell into a vicious circle. When they were not going to quit, they smoked less and less.
All three cases had a long family history of Smoking – 4 generations. Each story was started a painful breakup.
one was a betrayal and a painful breakup - the groom before the wedding left the bride and soon married another.
In another, sudden death of her husband, acceptance of the fact of his death, stuck on the anger phase in the grief process staying.
In the third, the child at a very young age was in the orphanage. What happened to parents unknown.
brings together these three stories shared a strong emotional resonance to the word “left”. These stories are highly-charged emotional core of nicotine addiction for several generations. Smoking was inherited, as a way to cope with unbearable, excessive feelings. the Wording “quit” for these clients when sudden rupture was so painful that led to the injury, raised to the surface the emotional pain, stirs old wounds and actualized transgenerational trauma.
When searching for a less painful language to name the process of recovery from tobacco dependence for each case were found new names – “turn from Smoking”,
“the first step to global changes in life”,
“a new life – new habits”.
if you change the wording of the name of the process (in the background of the story that launched a nicotine addiction in the family system) the number of cigarettes smoked in all three cases has declined sharply. Clients started “forget” to smoke.
Our brain on the one hand versatile, smart on, the other is very frugal. Saving our energy, it is often without our conscious participation (as in the cases described above) combines words with the same sound on semantic value. Connotation " to"quit" Smoking" resonated primary “the trauma of abandonment” and became a serious obstacle in working with nicotine addiction.
Smoking is only superficially seems a simple habit. In reality, every smoker is this weighty internal reasons. Each story is unique. Therefore, poor work systems, tips and advice «How to quit”. Each client has its own history, its own nuances and its own way of getting rid of nicotine addiction. A few manage to do it yourself.
If You don't have the willpower to give up cigarettes, if You some time I finished the smoke and again started don't despair, you're all right. Nicotine dependence experienced and crafty player and often beat it without professional help is impossible.
As a former smoker, I know that life without cigarettes is possible to the smoker with any experience of Smoking. As a psychologist, I know how to find way out of labyrinth of tobacco dependence. Please, I'll be happy to help. Together we will get through it! Remember: stop Smoking is real!