Having sexual fantasies is perfectly normal and even useful for individuals and couples. Rich erotic imagination goes hand in hand with a full-fledged sexual relation. When working with couples, as an exercise to improve communication skills I recommend to share their preferences and fantasies to each other. However some people uncomfortable to share their sexual fantasies, or Vice versa - they grow nervous at the idea of their partner fantasizing during sex or Masturbation.
Sharing sexual fantasies with a partner has its pros and cons.
It can bring you closer and spice up your sex life. On the other hand, depending on the nature of fantasy that divide and how it is interpreted, this can lead to feeling of insecurity in the relationship and cause your partner to feel stress or discomfort during sex.
What are the benefits of exchange of sexual fantasies with a partner ?
1. Increasing the level of trust and intimacy
the Disclosure of their sexual fantasies can be a very intimate experience, because the discovery of your personal sexual desires and dreams makes you a little vulnerable. If you allow the partner to enter in your world of sexual fantasies, your relationship will become even closer, and you'll both be able to feel a higher level of attachment to each other. Of course, this is more likely if your sexual fantasies are associated only with your current partner.
2. Building trust
If you open partner your sexual fantasies and ask him to do the same, this will strengthen the trust in your relationship. In a sense, you just put yourself on display and at risk of their feelings, revealing their personal sexual thoughts and desires. When your partner responds to you favorably, supports and expresses the desire to help you realize your fantasies, it strengthens your confidence to the partner.
in addition, if your fantasy involves relinquishing control and trust of the partner that occurs in the fantasies associated with submission, etc. of the embodiment of the fantasies can be a good exercise in building mutual confidence between you and your partner.
3. Open communication
Couples who do not communicate about sex, usually secretly unhappy with their sex lives and continue to suffer in silence. One of the ways to open channels of communication about sex is to share their sexual fantasies.
4. Fun and playful
to Share sexual fantasies with each other and come up with ways to incorporate them into your sexual experience can be very fun and playful. You can together be creative and think of to figure out how fantasy can become a reality, and then try out different options.
Sometimes just a conversation about how imagination can actually make both of you in this time or strengthen the anticipation of the next opportunity to cast it. For example, if your fantasy about having sex in an unusual place such as a roof or back seat of the car, come up with a plan to reality can be fun, relaxed and playful in itself.
Sharing sexual fantasies with your partner can be a rewarding experience, but can also lead to the opposite result. I'll tell you about the cons of disclosing their sexual fantasies with your partner in the next post.
However, if you want to share your sexual fantasies with a partner, but do not know how to do it, that some tips:
1. Recon the situation, test the soil
it is Not necessary to burden your partner for no reason declaring your sexual fantasies. First, feel the soil, starting the conversation about what the partner thinks about the sex life of your couple. If he/she is interested in discussing how to revive your intimate relationship, ask not and I would like it to try to share sexual fantasies. If so, allow him/her to go first.
upload the whole imagination right away. Instead, start with small steps, adding details gradually. For example, instead of asking your partner to tie you to the bed and spank her with a wooden spatula start with, ask them to tie your hands or a blindfold during sex.
3. you should Rely on known / familiar
Instead of asking partner to suddenly step outside his comfort zone, to exercise your imagination, start to develop what you are already doing. For example, if your fantasy that during sex you see others, ask your partner if you can have sex in front of a mirror with the lights on instead to ask about sex by the window with the curtains open and the lights on.