each of us has a certain system of values, their own principles that guide us daily in making decisions, talking to people, doing certain things. As a rule, we do not even think, why do so, and not otherwise, just follow their own convictions. Do not suspect that at times they fairly complicate life.

I!

Many modern ladies are sure that this is almost the only true formula for success. Although it is actually the belief "I am myself!" tops the hit parade women's toxic beliefs. Since this installation of capital breaks the life, negates the ability to achieve personal happiness, and at work can create issues. Surprised? Then let us all in order.

For several generations of girls were taught that they need to be strong and independent, should be able to take care of themselves. Therefore, we need to get an education, find a good job, to get squarely on his feet – and then to think about his personal life.

but what kind of personal life are we talking about? Why would a girl man, if she believes that everyone should carry on their own PLANO? Probably for the sake of status, because "as necessary", and child birth too, will eventually "need"... Well, then life will show. Of course, will tell. And usually, she shows that a woman with the slogan "I am myself!" is absolutely miserable. After all, she married a man weak and passive. That is absolutely natural. Only a man able to stay near the woman who, in fact, is the head of the family, for everyone makes decisions, seeks to control everything. After all, even in her childhood along the way, indoctrinated and other toxic installation. Men can not do anything, can't count on them, they can't be trusted, if not – they're all losers...

And, by the way, many girls were convinced that "fidelity" of such installations in childhood. Who better to study? Girls. Who set the example? Girls, of course. And class presidents, commanders of the brigades very often took the girls. So, my friends, nothing surprising.

of Course, not all the boys have grown weak and spineless. However, a strong man with a woman "I!" won't be long. He doesn't need to be controlled. He wants to take care of the woman, to protect her. Normal male model. But if the lady is not required, then why build relationships? As a result, people either break up or the man loses the battle because since childhood he has seen many strong women and weak-willed men... And once the goal is reached – the lady immediately loses interest. She wants to see next to a strong and successful person. Want. But she can't with him to be. Because the formula "I!" implies a total lack of confidence – to the men primarily, but also to the world at large.

PRESENT DETERMINES the FUTURE

do You agree? Do not rush to answer. Although it would seem, everything is logical: right now, every day, every minute we are laying the Foundation for your tomorrow. However, this belief with a double bottom. In favorable moments, it works for us, but if we are experiencing not the best times, that setting overrides the ability to change lives for the better. Now if it goes wrong, why should tomorrow be any different? As a result of this formula generates a negative situation.

not to fall into such a trap, it is necessary to divide concepts "the present" and "future". Consciousness must not form interdependency between today and tomorrow. Even if now you are experiencing a difficult period, in the future you can be happy and successful.

TOO LATE to CHANGE anything

Another harmful and very common belief. Especially funny coming from the mouth of young people. Later today, that six months ago would be the time. However, age is not the issue here. Many believe because the choice is already made, now we just have to accept, "Drudge", etc. Variations on the theme are many: "I am not 20 years old", "How to get a good job in 45, Yes, I need to be with two children", etc., etc. In General, "my train is gone".

actually, it's never too late to change your life. Neither 30 nor 50 ever. Enough to understand what you want – and can afford it.

And for this you need to get rid of toxic beliefs, which negates the opportunity to develop, to change life in accordance with their needs and desires.

LONELINESS IS a PROBLEM

Really? What is the problem? And the problem is only in toxic plants from the series "If a woman is lonely, so nobody needs it", "If a man who is single, it means that something is not right," "If a man is alone, then he is flawed, not worthy of love" etc. because Of this belief and there are unfortunate unions, when people "stick" to someone, just to get rid of loneliness. And fall into the trap.

to Live with someone solely out of fear of loneliness is a real problem. There are people who are generally comfortable to live in. Sometimes, that loneliness is the optimal choice in a certain moment of life. When you need to understand what you really want to do them, to devote time to their development interests.

ONLY POSITIVE!

of Course, positive thinking is correct and useful. Now, however, so promoted the cult of positive emotions that many literally forbid myself to be sad, to feel pain, or feel the aggression in certain situations is quite natural! The problem arises when people get stuck on the negative and started feeling sorry for myself, blame others for their own problems. But if, for example, you are dissatisfied with something and speak openly about their feelings or draw conclusions and move on – this is normal.

I Cannot be positive, and if someone deliberately gives himself such a setup, it causes an internal imbalance. As the person pushes himself, stops to feel life in all its fullness, inhibit negative emotions that leads to big problems, including deep depression and serious physical illness.

RETURNED WITH GRATITUDE

a well built system of beliefs allows a person to be happy and successful, have everything he wants. But if we are not satisfied with something, first of all, we need to understand what we are not happy. Career? Personal relations? Financial situation? The lack of free time?

Now try to find the toxic beliefs that prevent you realize your wishes, for example, to achieve material well-being or family to find happiness. Remember that you have ever heard or read that talked about this parents, grandmother, friends, teachers. Make a list of your toxic beliefs. By the way, whether you agree with them or not. On a conscious level, we can assume that money (for example) is the freedom, success and prosperity. But if you constantly have material difficulties, it means that somewhere deep down you sit the installation of a series of "money trouble", "by fair means do not get rich", etc. Look them up, write down, and then work through each.

physically, try to feel where it "stuck". Relax, listen to your feelings – your "inner enemy" will respond. Imagine, what form is toxic belief. It's a bundle of energy, a subject geometric figure? Think of a symbol, which you will set. It can be anything – a ball, a flower, a book, an abstract image. Then try to remember who you are this installation was awarded. Mentally return the symbol to the person, thanking him for the gift that helped you to realize certain things taught, but now you no longer need. And in its place put the opposite belief (as a symbol). For example, the installation of "the present determines the future" can be replaced with conviction, "I accept the present and have the right to strive for the best." "I myself!" change to "I need you", etc. So gradually you will be free from all toxic beliefs, replacing them useful – and will remove the obstacles to your happiness and success.

Dmitry KALE, President of the International Academy of psychogenetic.

© Oracle Dec 2018