I want to share with you the stories of two boys. One of them I've never seen. With others I met only once. I know about them from the words of my friends. It so happened that the boys of the same name and they are about the same age. And yet they share a common diagnosis, mental retardation. They don't know about each other. Now guys about thirty.
the First Bear was born and raised in the village. In the family except him had two more children. I don't know which school he went, most likely in the correctional. In the family Mike loved and treated him kindly, despite his personality. This attitude was passed on to relatives and fellow villagers. Especially loved my son and worked with him dad. Is not engaged in the lessons and taught how to cope with the housework. The bear, the boy, was a very interesting men's responsibilities, but still together with the father to know and learn new, such a pleasure. The boy grew up very independent boys.In the village of Misha know everything and offends no one. He is friendly, kind and always willing to help.
Not long ago, father Misha died, they were left alone with mom. Mother is very grieved the loss of a spouse, and she aggravated a chronic disease, so much so that she was taken by ambulance to the hospital. Mike for some time remained to manage the house alone. Brother and sister in the city and could not so fast to leave your business and come tearing into the village. Misha, meanwhile, was pretty handy himself. And went to the store, and the food was prepared, and the yard to fall out. Compassionate neighbors didn't leave Misha unattended, came and asked if they need help. Bear was done and waited for mom from the hospital.
Another Bear city resident. And mental retardation to him somehow for a long time did not put. And mother did everything possible to ensure that he graduated from the normal school. She tried very hard, performing together with him all the homework. However, sometimes cursing and calling him a fool. Home Bear to do anything not allowed, for the same reason that he will spoil and teach him nothing is possible, because like a fool. When his mental characteristics became clearly visible, the family were isolated from human eyes. Parents began to be ashamed of the Bear, stopped going with him to visit and walk. And to anyone else is not invited. Only school the Bear went properly. Father increasingly began to run away and the boy almost did.
Mishkin mom never dared to give birth to her second child, was afraid and said that this is so much trouble, and she can't handle. I saw a Bear only once. A compassionate relative of his took with their children on a ski trip. He was at that time seventeen years old. He looked at the world, mouth open, eyes preteen. Was immensely happy that he was invited. All the time asked something, fussed, tried to help everyone and rejoiced. To me, he was impressed good-natured boy. Meanwhile, the Bear grew, and he wanted communication, and, young energy beat over the edge. But my parents were relentless, such a fool nowhere. Or hurt him, or he tries anything. And he did. He ran away from home, and was stealing money from my parents. Steal because the street guys, talked with him exclusively until he does. And then lost interest.
the Parents of the Bears, when he realized that with his son has serious problems, United. The father was rushing home from work, and they, along with his mother watched the unfortunate Bear that he will not run away, taking cell phones and money. Common problems brought to the parents, and they found a way to ease, starting to have a drink together. And as the Bear will not start up, and he was forced to stay at home, addicted to alcohol and he. Parents are poured below was not torn anywhere. And the Bear really was will not have. The last attempt his escape, was a night jump from a third floor window in winter. He fell into the snow and badly injured leg. After the guy was in the hospital, where he was finally a long-awaited communication and despite health problems, he looked happy. Then died Mishkin father, and they were left with the mother alone. Live on two pensions together and drink too much. Alcoholism Bear has acquired several serious chronic diseases.
Here are stories of two boys. I do not blame anyone, everyone deals with the trouble so, as you can. And diseases are incurable and it seems to affect them it is impossible. I can only assume that the parents of the second Bears stuck in hopeless depression about its features. And parents first, survived and took the diagnosis of his son. Learned to do with his special son, and made his and his life, as best as possible. Have happy parents, happy children, even if they are special.
the Psychologist Marianne Plesea
the group of psychological support for relatives of people with mental diseases. Skype and in person in Yekaterinburg.