One of the most biggest fears of the neurotic personality, fear of disapproval. To explain this fear seems to be that between the "image" which the neurotic is to others and myself, and all those repressed, that he hides, there is a huge difference. This picture, the facade is a chance for the neurotic escape from a hidden anxiety, and he is forced to support her, suffering from internally seeded with yourself. The basis of fear are replacing part of the individual. Such insincerity with oneself breeds fear of disapproval, and he needs to hide the insincerity, to exclude the possibility of disapproval.
so what does a neurotic.
first, from yourself and from others he hides the scale of its aggression. It is not only external aggression, such as anger, jealousy towards others, hostility towards them and the desire for revenge. It's a hostile orientation towards others, his secret requirements: the neurotic does not want to achieve their goals, does not want to take responsibility for their own lives. Secretly he requires from others that they did, he wants to use the energy of other people, what they stood for or attachment, obedience and "love" (which has nothing to do with true love), or power over others and exploitation. And as soon as the other touches his hostility or secret requirements, develops neurotic anxiety, but not because he feels guilty for the use of others, but because he fears that if the hostility will reveal, he will not be able to get what he needs from others. That is, he feels a threat to their "plans" and he's growing anxiety.
second, the neurotic's hiding from others their helplessness and vulnerability, rather, how powerless and helpless he feels, how weak and disturbing feel. To hide it, the neurotic creates the appearance of strength, which gives him a sense of security, he has shown the propensity to dominate, and gradually begins to feel the weakness as a danger, but also finds her worthy of contempt, not only in himself but also in others. Weakness he calls any discrepancy to its requirements, and, as inevitably finds manifestations of this weakness, begins to despise myself for it. Since the neurotic is convinced that other people, like him, despise weakness, he tries by all means to hide it, but fear of disclosure, so the anxiety continues and even increases.
so, two mysteries neurosis - the hostility and the weakness that hides neurotic personality of yourself and others, and reinforce each other, supporting, thus, neurosis.