In our culture often occurs the phenomenon of passive-aggressive behavior. What is it? It is reflected in the fact that man does not allow himself to openly show discontent and prefers to repress it. The expression of aggression takes place indirectly. For example, through action or inaction, in relation to the offender, or yourself that happen as if "by accident" (forgot to call back, dropped, broke, etc.)

the Taboo on the expression of aggression in society is instilled from childhood. You should always be nice and keep quiet if don't like something. Because complain only ill-mannered and disobedient children. This pattern of behavior follows us into adulthood. Can't say no, can't say no, can't stand up for themselves — formed a tolerance to violence. Out of fear of appearing angry, aggressive, unfriendly suppressed the desire to repulse the offender. And the fact that you act is completely unacceptable for some reason nobody thinks.

it Happens that under the hot hand fall our loved ones. After all, to displace anger on "safe" object is much easier. Where relatives will disappear, love will not cease.

the Suppression of aggression can result in psychosomatic illnesses. Frequent headaches, and indeed any of the pain are the bodily expression of anger, which was addressed to the irritant, but settled in the body. This may also include injury to myself ("accidentally" cut, hit, burned), eating junk food, drinking alcohol (tobacco, drugs). And this is only a small number of examples in what could become suppressed anger.

What to do? To suppress the impossible, and take out your emotions on others (even deserved) is not always appropriate. the solution of the problem will help:

Skills containerbase aggression. You need to learn restrain and withstand strong emotions. The containment from the suppression is different in that the feeling of anger is psychologically processed and temporarily "Packed", and then to give him a discharge. Handle anger help thinking about the incident, analysis of its behavior. It is important to learn withstand strong emotions independently, trying as possible containerwith their feelings to loved ones. This skill is simply necessary because not always there will be people able to support us; besides, one should not unnecessarily burden others with their feelings, most of them can cope on their own.

To discharge the accumulated emotions exist acceptable and safe for yourself and others forms of expression of aggression. For example, physical activity (sports, dancing, cleaning the house...), creativity (drawing, modeling, knitting...), work... the list can continue.

Be eco-friendly in relation to itself. To maintain a balanced state will help a few simple rules. 1) Try not to procrastinate things that can be done now (incomplete takes away peace of mind) 2) Create comfort in the workplace and at home (remember how annoying have not removed things) 3) minimize communication energy vampires. Think how you feel after talking with friends and colleagues: the rise or emptiness? Reconsider your social circle, perhaps you should make some contacts to a minimum. 4) Place boundaries in your interaction with others. Don't be afraid to refuse or to say that something does not suit you. Do not hide your desire to please others.

As you can see, the aggression itself is not bad — it is a very powerful energy. It is important to learn to channel it in the direction of creation, avoiding self-destruction.