Exercise for those who love to feel guilty and to blame. Who used often to hear other people's accusations. Take two sheets of A4 paper.Possible.
On the first page write all the allegations in the third person. For example, He or she is so-and-so, so-and-so..do Not skimp..
Then dismantle all these charges on items (it's important to do it in two steps)
After all charges prepared, take a second leaf.
Now, you-the lawyer of the accused. At stake is someone's life. To lose it is impossible.
so. The lawyer reads the first charge. And writes a justification. And so on all the charges.
After the attorney said, the Prosecutor reads all the answers a lawyer. And makes additional charges, if he sees a gap in protection.
Step 4 the Lawyer to repel the second attack of the Prosecutor.
And so until then, until the lawyer wins the case)))Man is born successful. It so makes the environment. In childhood we all absorb. The child grew successful parents often have to repeat "I believe in you. You did a great job. You only will reach, no doubt. You have me-the best. Did not work-nothing. Everything will work out. I love you anyway."
the reality is the opposite. For example, the parents manage their expectations of the child and constantly criticized him:"He needs to study well and become a doctor, but it is football all day rides! Here's Lena from next door son is a high achiever, obedient. And you, twit!" The child in his address hear only criticism. It's bad. He has no virtues, good qualities, he does not know his strengths. His achievements are not recognized. He just knows that someone is better than him. Such people drive themselves as dray horses, achieving heights and prove to mom that they don't obaldui. Or put up with the fact that they are losers and there is always someone better than them. But in both cases they are not free, they are pursued by disbelief.
There are still perfectionists who don't give themselves margin for error. This school honors, which are now excellent and in life. They are the best, but not because you believe in yourself, because any mistake is equal to death. And so much intense anxiety and fear behind perfectionism. This is just the children of parents who were ONLY praised for the achievements:"You're done, because it brought the five, took first place at the Olympics." But if four or second place - only a contemptuous glance or a condescending silence. A child needs love. He will not survive. But love is possible only when you have done something perfect. And if you make a mistake, you will not love. And then there is the terrible fear of bugs and further the idea that just because their love is impossible. Only for something.