Get away from me, I never want to see you ever. You devastated my life to the bottom, I don't know who I am and what I am without you.
I don't need your concern, I don't need your feelings, they make me weak and defenseless. They are killing me, istoday and thinner my will.
Trust. I forgot what it is. Trust yourself and your desires. I lived for you I breathed for you. You hate everything associated with me. And I hate you. You're my pain you're my curse, you're my rock. and I don't want to carry it.
Get away from me, take it shake it and never come back. I will not survive.
You ruined my life. and I don't know if I can do you for it to forgive. I'm afraid of. I'm scared. I am very very scared that will remain so forever. what I won't be able to find himself and to subject himself to his own will.
And you. you have a whole life ahead, don't blow it. I feel so guilty. I blame that nothing came of it. and you're to blame. you are guilty guilty guilty. But I can't prove it.
are You guilty me. I thought you were a Saint. The Holy man, who shone once my life your love for me. And I was blind. Blind once and for all. I've forgotten everything. Forgot himself. And maybe me I never was. I don't know, really. I don't know and never find out.
And I don't know if I can survive now. without you, without your damn sick of love and how its such an unhealthy, poor and terrible, but it's our fucking relationship.
You're my pain and my love in one bottle. And I hate you. And love. And I want to kill you, if you were alive. If.
But you decided before. You made it without me. I envy you. I couldn't. I continued to live without you. It's not so bad. But not as good.
I suffer, suffer, learn to enjoy every day... but I can't. Can't enjoy life without you by my side.
You around? you still Radom? I often ask myself this question. What if I were?
what if you see everything that happens. As I explain it. I wanted to be loyal to you. To the grave. And now. As I explain all this?
I am ashamed. I am ashamed, honestly. And you? and you are not ashamed that you cheated? you are not ashamed that drink? that beat and raped? are not you ashamed?
do Not be ashamed for all that you have done in life? and no, I'm not ashamed to remind you of it after death. You know... I'm sorry, but I remember everything. Every scar, every shot, every moment that was so painful and unbearable. But I remember out of love. That's all I have of you left. Imagine what I'm sick?? Do you have any idea how sick I am? You? us... for our patients at the end of the relationship.
I think I am infected, and the infection coursing through my veins. I, literally, ready to tear out these veins that would get rid of you. But want and can not. You know I can't! Understand or not? Understand or not, I ask you??!!
You're my pain. The pain in my heart pain in my brain, the pain in my body.
I gave you everything. Everything that I had mine and not mine. And it it cost me dearly.
you Know, I think I'm mad. Furiously and mercilessly. Mad at you and your whole world. So big and so small at the same time.
You miserable. Did you know that you're poor?
you even friends really was not.
Yes there is... and I have too. Because you are my main man. Understand?
I narrowed my world to you.
I could suffocate. I betrayed myself regularly. But I chose you.
And you didn't pick me. No, of course you will say that this is bullshit and you chose me out of all this diversity of life. But it is not.
You chose her bottle, mom, death. You picked many other women, but not me.
not our child. I hope you know that we had a child? Or do you recall?
have You ever wondered what it's like to raise children? They need affection, care, parents? You know? they need responsibility. And you? What would you give to our children? you gave our child?
What? can't hear? All you've got??
And what did you have?
a Little mind power and intention to be a good father?
you Know, I have to disappoint you .Not ride.
Oh, you tried? Tried so hard? Bad could mean. It was not enough.
how so? There was no need to give birth? Do you even hear what you're saying? Why?
Because we had to, because it's time, because I wanted a child from you... because I loved you and it was our child...
Let not the time... Let him... I understand. I know. I do know, I was there with you, remember?
But you promised. To help. You promised that everything will be fine... or is it I promised?
I do Not remember. But I remember that it was supposed to be good. But I didn't.
I did Not well know?
I've lost everything and you and her. But I found, thank her for it. And you... And you never will with us.
And you know... maybe it's for the best. No you don't need to. And not again the pain and terror, the hatred and the painful passion of those tests my and your will.
All the better.
Once I understand exactly what's best...
in the meantime, get out of my life. You are no longer in my power, no longer you flow through my veins. No longer are you the center of my universe. Not you. And I'm partly glad.
I Have a chance to stay alive... or not?
You left me a chance? So many years have passed, and I never realized the chance or not. Does this even make any sense. Is there life without you any damn sense.
Oh yeah... I forgot, I'm not talking to you anymore... well.
farewell. Don't think badly of me.
I'm mad at you. I hate you.
I love you. I remember you.