In this article I will describe one of the most common complexes - complex abandoned.

Complex thrown is a consequence of childhood trauma, is a severe violation of the emotional sphere accompanied by and received a trauma of the person throughout life unless it is understood, integrated or healed.

the Complex is inside a person seems to be saying that nobody wants it, his wishes will never come true, so they are best avoided; to get something you have to care about others, and then I'll need, but just so nobody is gonna love

What is the cause of the complex? Lack of attention, warmth, love and care from parents in childhood. Each child for the full development of needs love and support, every child wants to receive them. If the parents are unable to respond to this natural need of the child due to various circumstances, do not perform well enough their parental responsibilities, the child grows up with emotional hunger. When this situation lasts long enough, the child loses all hope that he would ever notice, accept, love and begins to feel useless.

This situation may arise in dysfunctional families where parents openly neglect their duties in the strength of antisocial behavior, and in quite normal families where the parents work a lot, so not paying your child enough attention. In such circumstances, the child grows extremely introverted, distrustful, aloof, he has very difficult relations with others.

How complex manifests itself in adult life?

People with complex cast can be very successful in life, have significant achievements in career and Affairs. They have to rely only on themselves. At the same time they did, even their loved ones will not let my soul suspended, closed, never allow myself to show weakness. They don't trust people because they are afraid to be thrown again and again experience his helplessness. So they build around themselves a kind of protective barrier, for which no one could enter, with loved ones often cold and overly controlled.

If the life of a man with a complex cast was not right, they are too attached, afraid of being alone, often suffer from addictions and eating disorders. They are willing to tolerate from a partner any hardship, but would not feel abandoned.

the positive side complex can be attributed to the tendency to autonomy, high level of responsibility, self-sufficiency, the ability to care for others.

the negative side is the lack of self-care. People with this complex very much in need of love and care, but can not ask, he asks nothing for himself, because he's afraid to be rejected all over again feeling rejected and helpless.

In what direction to move for the healing of this complex?

a Lot of slow work to ensure that people again began to trust others. Learn to care for themselves so to give yourself directly what he expects from others in return for his care. Love yourself like the most important person.

to make it clear that he will never get just what is needed, but you will get far more than ever received.

to understand that relationships are built on exchange, it is necessary to give and take in relationships, without expecting the kind of relationship that will be perfect.

Previous articles about complexes cut:

https://www.b17.ru/article/60951/

https://www.b17.ru/article/65274/

https://www.b17.ru/article/98801/

to be Continued.