listen to yourself difficult. Especially if I never did, and always wore a mask handy man and listening to others. Those from whom, as it seemed, depended on your survival. When to Express themselves was dangerous when is good to get.
When it was forbidden to show his real emotions and feelings that naturally arise in children's minds. Because it's a bad feeling. Or because good kids don't do that. Or because you have to be to be loved. Could laugh, and to devalue and reject.
Fear of rejection. Yeah. That had to listen to others, understand what they want from you. How to behave in order not to be rejected. And as for myself to forget. About their needs, desires and dreams. Because if you show yourself, yourself, to anything good it will not. br>
That's just the unspoken needs and desires never go away. They are suppressed. And then proryvat out dependencies of all kinds, psychosomatic, depression, low self-esteem, and so on. br>
Indeed, if I do not have the right to be yourself, why would self-assessment be adequate? If I do not feel worthy of many things, such as joy, love, acceptance, then even if someone loves me and accepts I just can't believe it. Because I'm not worthy to be and to manifest. And any failure and rejection hurts too much, maintaining and strengthening the pattern of unworthiness .
Ask yourself - what are you feeling now? What do you want now? And in response - silence. There is no skill to listen to ourselves. Emptiness, not-meeting, pain. Good start. It's like sitting inside a small child, Gorodische yourself from all sides with a brick wall. Not to feel pain, to protect themselves and survive. br>
But eventually the opposite happens - a blank brick wall stopping to interact with the world, to see and feel other people and to show himself to them. Banging your head against the wall, trying to punch her, are of little help. Panic and claustrophobia of the soul. Want to get out there and rip the hell out of all of the protection that you built in order to stay alive. br>
Here only the removal of protection can lead to retraumatization with even more intensity, and then the state of being between a rock and a hard place may seem sheer nonsense. The field flowers. br>
to begin to feel life around , have a long, brick by brick, to dismantle the wall of protection. And Yes, to mourn every brick, to understand why it was necessary to live and to let go. Long, painful and agonizing. And , of course, along with a professional in the psychotherapeutic process. br>
Then gradually released from his terrible prison, your inner child will come to light and with gratitude will smile to you.
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