What is the egotism and how to handle it?


Egotism – it is a form of interrupting contact from the perspective of Gestalt therapy. This is the case when you realize a lot about yourself. In view of new experience and impressions received in the course of therapy, it can also be called insight. - As I had not thought about it, - could say. But leaving the therapist's office, forget about it 15 minutes later or 2 days. These impressions, experiences and insights do not become part of your experience and part of yourself.

How so?

Bright insights, new awareness – and it's really awareness – must be experience, but this is not happening.

Egotism – quite toxic and nasty stuff, which can be attributed to past experience.

you Have a set of ideas about yourself that may like or may not like. If you came to psychotherapy, most likely, some part of these ideas, concepts and opinions on other people, you are not satisfied. But, despite the fact that you came to therapy and going to change, get rid of these established ideas – you're not going. Moreover, some images are so fused with you that you sincerely do not understand – as without it to live now. And you can even not to think about it, the fear of losing these images, but when we meet in the process of psychotherapy with the news that compete with these images of yourself, often it happens so, that the concept of winning. News are forgotten, images remain.


Everyone strives for the status quo. Safest to live in stability. And every time you meet something new, that stability, even if you don't like her, is threatened.

for Example, have you experienced a feeling of tenderness and gratitude, and in your perceptions about yourself, you are only capable of feeling anger and superiority. Competition? She's the most!

Or you learned that you are sensitive and vulnerable. It happened in the form of insight, bright awareness, and this awareness of you even like it. But you have a concept of what you need to be strong and controlling. Competition? Yes!

Or have you discovered your need for recognition, and a lifetime to live the life of an introvert who preferred to sit in the back row. What is with this need to do now, if it does not fit into the picture of yourself that you had before?

This is one of the answers to the question of why psychotherapy lasts quite a long time.

the best news you find about yourself, that are released outside of awareness. It is due to the egotism insight in psychotherapy – not the most important. You forget about the new experience. He becomes a part of you and life doesn't change.

What to do?

For the egotism it is impossible to influence directly. It arose from control. If you are struggling with egotism, it only intensified. If you attack the concept of a new experience, they become even more sustainable. But there is a solution.

do Not run the process explanation after a session with your therapist where you got the insight. At least for a while. Nothing to do, nothing to think, be alone. The less you explain and control, the more likely a new experience assimilate.

the therapist has the opportunity to work with egotism and indirectly – to manage the process. A separate insight, literally. Taking the particular feelings that came, and make them the subject of the session. For example, a client felt the tenderness and vulnerability in the last session but after the session, these feelings escaped. Need to take vulnerability into the work – reinforcing that feeling, to understand this experience again. This jewelry work, the client cannot do without the therapist. And not every therapist does this.

Working with egotism – one of the most difficult. And if you are working with projections and introjections can be taught on the fingers, then to work with the egotism required experience, qualifications, perseverance, sensitivity of the therapist.  

However, such therapists exist, and egotism, with a professional approach, retreat. Any ideas about yourself, past experiences and traumatic findings can change. Graduates programs Pogodin Academy confirm this.

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