Many of us have heard this wonderful sentence: "Give me the strength to change what I can change, patience to accept what cannot change and the wisdom to distinguish one from the other."
But for my taste, the most difficult situation - partial control, when everything depends not only from me. This, in particular, the tasks of the "want it ..."
a well-Known fact - the other can not be undone. But if you look at things realistically, something I can do. In my Arsenal of words, persuasion, and sometimes shameless manipulation and more. That is, I'm not that completely impotent. But it may well make a huge amount of effort, and the target falls drop. And it Angers. Really want to start to blame and manipulate even more unconscionable. Really want to see your efforts paid off. And very spoiled attitude.
What to do? To use common sense. Yes, I can be sure I know what's best. For example, if my idiot starts to learn, he will regret it. It is very likely that this is true. But. I can't live for a loved one. Can't put my head.
I can announce arguments. I can try to reach. But I have to understand that the situation is not totally dependent on me. Somewhere is the hell of my helplessness, how would I hate that. It is a reality.
even if I see more, even if I can calculate the consequences of... My responsibility to tell the responsibility of the middle - to hear and decide. And if he does not, as I want to... This is a bad cause for resentment.
Why is it important to feel the border, beyond which comes the territory "can't change"? Because it will exist, whether we like it or not. And act better given the reality. Very frustrating to look for this argument to work, when it does not exist. It is very painful to pour tons of energy into the void. Suffering a lot, and zero sense. Better-then eventually nobody will.
And than then to suffer and blame the loved ones in stupidity and ingratitude, it is better to do everything you can, and stop there.