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if I was his wife or mother?

How often do we hear stories where wives feel the "mothers" to their husbands?

"How could you? After all I did for him! Who he was when we met? Yes, if it weren't for my parents....! Yes, I indulged all his whims! I from the kitchen climbs! And he...". And much more that you can hear from a woman with anger in her voice and with very resentful eyes.

Such stories very much. The woman sure did for her husband all the best: supportive in difficulties, shared their experiences, took care of his parents, made him a man, and more. He, at the time, lost interest in it, and it is possible that left to another and there may be a list of different options. The woman thinks he is not appreciated all that she gave him, did not repay it with loyalty and devotion, was not rewarded even in words. And that happens pretty often!

Why?

If the family of the girl mother was for all the "mom", and for the children and for her husband, she just internalizes this stereotype. No matter how in reality, she's Mature mentally or physically. The bearer of such a program can not only the girl's mother, but her ancestors – relatives: great-grandmother, grandmother, aunt. It's possible that the girl's mother who finds it difficult to bear the burden of the family alone, since childhood, passed on to the younger daughter "care" about the father or brothers and sisters.

( "warm up dad's soup, and that he can not" or "I'll do it, and then you're slow"!!!)

And it's not just normal household care about each other, which should be in every family! Is that the mother "reports" daughters confidence total male worthlessness, inability, anything, really, to do, helplessness, stupidity and many other things.

When the girl Matures, it shifts the kind of relationships "wife - mother for her husband" - in your personal life.

One of the reasons of infidelity!

Over time, the husband begins more and more to catch the "maternal" care in the relationship with his wife and her actions, he ceases to feel "unfinished" in her eyes. Husband away from his wife as "mom" and looking for the present of respect and attention among friends, and yet, as often happens, gets a mistress. After sleeping with the "mother" is recorded in the deepest layers of the subconscious.

self-Assertion at the expense of others!

And it happens that the girl, as a child, in his parent's family had the right to vote, she was constantly criticized: the way she learns, her actions, appearance, manner of dress, her friends, a lot of restrictions and. Therefore, such a girl, as an adult, reluctantly, raised the huge insecurity — as a person and as a woman. Marrying, having children, her family became her box of revenge: she struggles to prove its relevance, forced to reckon with their opinion, virtually forcing the family to live in accordance only with their plans. It is because of their internal insecurity constantly "corrects" and "educate" her husband, automatically becoming "with a knowing and careful mother". And it can bring the consequences of the rupture of family relations!

And there are many examples there!

the Strategy of behavior "as a mother" arises not only from soaked stereotype, but from my own insecurities of women. Should seriously consider, if Your life be such infantile men, how Mature You are? Not whether You yourself as a helpless child? The child, who was abused as a child, which nurtured a sense of self-doubt?

Loving as You think, "immature" man, try to realize what You haven't grown up themselves, and try to "grow up" with him! Don't force it!

Think! You Might find the answer why in Your life, You, not only for my husband but maybe for others, "caring mom"!!!!!

After all, confident, Mature and self-sufficient women attracting into your life the same men as they are.

Our partner is always given to us to pass some life lessons, and therefore, always somehow reflects our own shortcomings.

It is a difficult path to awareness itself, but to pass it is never too late at any age!!!

Be happy!

2013-07-11
Статья выложена в ознакомительных целях. Все права на текст принадлежат ресурсу и/или автору (B17 B17)

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