Why it's scary to change and to know yourself?


Each person want something more than he has at the moment, the difference may be only in the regions. For someone the relationship will be the most important result, for someone career, someone will choose creative achievements. With all the variety of desires one thing, people want more. But if there is demand and supply. Nowadays, you have to be beyond lazy to not learn about some kind of training on pumping of certain qualities, abilities or skills. Different kinds of motivators meets any user of the global network on the day several times. The majority of motivators suggests that the target's got to go, regardless of any obstacles and difficulties. The result, which can be achieved to become for a person the primary motivating force, it is also called the motivation "carrot in front." It works not for all, then it is suggested that a motivation "carrot behind", that is, the human urge to make any steps to avoid unpleasant events for him. In any case, people with these motivations needs to obtain the result. And of course, in the first place often goes motivation, geared up, to achievements and results. This can manifest itself in distorted and positive the perception of reality, when a person deliberately tries to ignore those aspects of life that do not bring him satisfaction, noticing only positive. While a person creates the illusion that life will improve. Here, it is appropriate to give a comparison with the movement of the man in the ice. Imagine that a person goes with your eyes up and absolutely not paying attention to the ice underfoot, it is easy to assume that after some time he will lie on this very ice, and a fall can be very painful. With regard to the avoidance of negative consequences and use only this method the story will be very similar. Very difficult for a person to achieve some goal using only one motivation, but their combined use can give a person the desired result. But it is impossible to guarantee.

first and foremost, any achievement and any personal growth are determined by the adoption itself, without that movement is impossible, we talked about this at the time, Karl Yung. Moreover, under the adoption is to understand not only the positive qualities and negative. It is the awareness of their "ugly" qualities, the revision of attitudes could be the impetus to achieve result. After all, for life, under the influence of society, people hoard such manifestations of the person and tries to hide them as deeply as possible, suppress them, due to their perception tries to declare that they have no proof at all. When a person declares that he never experiences anger, resentment, irritation, then have to fight the temptation to ask him a question: "where's your halo? /the light above his head/". In most cases, the suppression of such feelings is not the ability to manage them. Often people try to hide from others the fact that according to society, is the subject of condemnation. In my opinion, in life there is no concept of wrong, if through any of its quality it is possible to make life more comfortable so it is necessary to use the/I mean, sensible approach without bias in the direction of crime or abuse another person/. But the difficulty lies in the fact that the habit to hide is very strong roots, and often there is a substitution of concepts, the ideal self, the image that the person would like to have in the eyes of others, and the real I who the person really is. Person is nice to believe in the ideal I and he is making some effort to do this. If one of friends says that it is some quality there and it's objectively present, but this quality doesn't fit the picture-perfect I am human, it is likely that between friends will happen quarrel. People are afraid of what is inside of them, this fear is still very strong and is supported by the fact that prohibitions and taboos. It really is scary to realize that you're actually not the same, not as good as want to seem. To admit even to himself , not to mention others that you have those "forbidden" qualities and traits is not easy. One of the reasons that most people avoid being alone in that in this case, face with your real self face to face, and it is extremely unpleasant. Even in the privacy of the people prefer to watch TV, read, but not look inside yourself.

To realize the necessity of knowledge and acceptance of positive and negative qualities of the person comes on your own. Any attempt from outside to force it to do will have success. It's like the egg, the formation of life is possible only if the shell breaks inside the bird itself. Moreover, the result is not always immediately conscious of them. Remember the fairy tale "the Ugly duckling", the main character was at first afraid to appear to others, even when he turned into the Swan.

Live with joy! Anton Black.

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Anton Yurievich
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